What do you think?
Rate this book
Healing Your Lost Inner Child: How to Stop Impulsive Reactions, Set Healthy Boundaries and Embrace an Authentic Life
Most people don't realize how much unresolved emotional pain they carry around. They don't know why they always feel depressed, anxious, victimized, or disappointed. They wonder why they keep making the same self-sabotaging impulsive decisions.
These patterns often stem from their lost inner child, which carries a false narrative that has been on repeat since childhood. The hurt emotions resulting from childhood experiences of abuse, neglect, or trauma show up in adulthood as explosive anger, isolation, bad relationship choices, negative self-talk, feelings of being overwhelmed, being a people pleaser, and keeping others at arm's length.
In Healing Your Lost Inner Child, Psychotherapist and Reiki master Robert Jackman takes you on a personal journey to explore unresolved wounds from your early life using the HEAL process for healing and embracing an authentic life. Through stories and exercises, this easy-to-read book will encourage you to learn how to stop giving in to your wounded inner child's emotional pain frozen inside a snow globe within you. Each chapter gently takes you closer to this original wounding so you can acknowledge and finally heal your pain. Move from being an impulsive reactor to an authentic, conscious creator in your life.
The Healing Your Lost Inner Child Companion Workbook is also available to help you develop a deeper understanding of your relationships, codependency patterns and triggers, and create a self-nurturing plan.
These patterns often stem from their lost inner child, which carries a false narrative that has been on repeat since childhood. The hurt emotions resulting from childhood experiences of abuse, neglect, or trauma show up in adulthood as explosive anger, isolation, bad relationship choices, negative self-talk, feelings of being overwhelmed, being a people pleaser, and keeping others at arm's length.
In Healing Your Lost Inner Child, Psychotherapist and Reiki master Robert Jackman takes you on a personal journey to explore unresolved wounds from your early life using the HEAL process for healing and embracing an authentic life. Through stories and exercises, this easy-to-read book will encourage you to learn how to stop giving in to your wounded inner child's emotional pain frozen inside a snow globe within you. Each chapter gently takes you closer to this original wounding so you can acknowledge and finally heal your pain. Move from being an impulsive reactor to an authentic, conscious creator in your life.
The Healing Your Lost Inner Child Companion Workbook is also available to help you develop a deeper understanding of your relationships, codependency patterns and triggers, and create a self-nurturing plan.
284 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 1, 2020
About the author
Robert Jackman
5 books24 followersRobert Jackman is a best selling author, inner child expert and a board certified psychotherapist with the National Board of Certified Counselors who has helped many people on their healing path for more than twenty years. In addition to his private practice, he has taught master’s level classes at National Louis University in the Chicago area, led outpatient groups in clinics and hospitals and been a guest speaker on podcasts, panels and telesummits on the topics of codependency, boundary setting, couples communication, inner child, mindfulness and the role of spirituality in healing, and participated in numerous weekend retreats with Victories for Men.
Robert is also a Reiki master who uses energy psychology in his practice and personal development. He considers himself a codependent in recovery, always working on boundary setting, discernment, nurturing his relationships and connecting with the authentic self. He lives in the far west suburbs of Chicago and in Oregon with his family. He enjoys photography, kayaking, gardening, and nurturing and delighting his inner child.
Robert is also a Reiki master who uses energy psychology in his practice and personal development. He considers himself a codependent in recovery, always working on boundary setting, discernment, nurturing his relationships and connecting with the authentic self. He lives in the far west suburbs of Chicago and in Oregon with his family. He enjoys photography, kayaking, gardening, and nurturing and delighting his inner child.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 52 reviews
January 5, 2021
I truly believe that this is the most important book I've ever read. I am still at the beginning of my journey but I have been searching for an understanding of myself for decades. The examples throughout the book are very relatable and the author seemed to really understand what I feel and what I have been through.
I have felt intense anxiety since my earliest memories and have experienced chronic gastritis, migraines and muscle pains in my neck and shoulders. As an adult this has continued along with a feeling I couldn't cope at work and in relationships and wanted to go live alone in a cabin in the woods! I have engaged with mental health services half a dozen times and tried various medications, none have given any lasting relief. With no understanding of the source or triggers of my anxiety and stress, I didn't feel like I could ever find an adequate coping strategy.
I happened to pick up a book by Carl Jung and the idea of the wounded inner child sparked something in me and eventually lead me to purchasing a copy of this book. The self exploration and the resulting chain reaction of understanding my self and experiences of shaming, emotional neglect and bullying have felt like an awakening.
I have been able to develop a set of tools to support me, a way of understanding my responses and a strategy for my development. This is exactly what I was looking for, for so long (and after reading many other self help books).
For the first time at 35, I feel positive and optimistic about my future.
The most important advice I can give, is to approach the content without allowing the ego to protect you and accept the reality of your actions, your childhood and your caregivers' actions (you probably wouldn't be reading this book if you were happy everything was perfect!).
I wish you all health and happiness wherever you are in this moment :)
I have felt intense anxiety since my earliest memories and have experienced chronic gastritis, migraines and muscle pains in my neck and shoulders. As an adult this has continued along with a feeling I couldn't cope at work and in relationships and wanted to go live alone in a cabin in the woods! I have engaged with mental health services half a dozen times and tried various medications, none have given any lasting relief. With no understanding of the source or triggers of my anxiety and stress, I didn't feel like I could ever find an adequate coping strategy.
I happened to pick up a book by Carl Jung and the idea of the wounded inner child sparked something in me and eventually lead me to purchasing a copy of this book. The self exploration and the resulting chain reaction of understanding my self and experiences of shaming, emotional neglect and bullying have felt like an awakening.
I have been able to develop a set of tools to support me, a way of understanding my responses and a strategy for my development. This is exactly what I was looking for, for so long (and after reading many other self help books).
For the first time at 35, I feel positive and optimistic about my future.
The most important advice I can give, is to approach the content without allowing the ego to protect you and accept the reality of your actions, your childhood and your caregivers' actions (you probably wouldn't be reading this book if you were happy everything was perfect!).
I wish you all health and happiness wherever you are in this moment :)
August 12, 2023
I've gotten an idea of how self-help books are organised as I've read quite a few over the years and this book has taken the typical format, a step by step of what to dos and how to do it. There are a many great tools for the user to keep and add to their tool kit for emotional growth but in my opinion not suitable for someone who's really suffering through emotional pain because this style can sound very unsympathetic and prescriptive.
The voice narrator (from audible) used is someone i've heard before in other self-help books and I thought his voice was unsuitable for as sensitive a topic as this because to go through the inner child the emotions are messy, complicated, and hard. Unfortunately the voice does not reflect this.
However, despite the voice I still enjoyed the book because there were some very helpful tips and methods into exploring your inner child when you are more stable and have to strength to do the work.
The voice narrator (from audible) used is someone i've heard before in other self-help books and I thought his voice was unsuitable for as sensitive a topic as this because to go through the inner child the emotions are messy, complicated, and hard. Unfortunately the voice does not reflect this.
However, despite the voice I still enjoyed the book because there were some very helpful tips and methods into exploring your inner child when you are more stable and have to strength to do the work.
August 15, 2022
I also so thankful to my therapist who let me know about this book. The insight and exercises in it have been very impactful for me. I’m not a novice to the internal family systems therapeutic approach, but “Healing Your Lost Inner Child” goes beyond that. Within the chapters, I was forced to reflect on my current feelings and triggers and how they came about, as well as what I can do to reroute them. This gave me a chance to truly mourn for my younger, traumatized self and get to understand myself and what I do. That understanding has led to greater compassion. I’m finding that recollection of hard memories doesn’t sting as much. There is still pain, but it is something I am learning to tolerate more.
November 10, 2020
A Must Read
This book will address many wounds that occurred in childhood. As I read through it, I thought of many people who can benefit from this book. The author hits the nail on the head when he speaks about the wounded inner child; so get some help and read this book. It’s a good place to start.
This book will address many wounds that occurred in childhood. As I read through it, I thought of many people who can benefit from this book. The author hits the nail on the head when he speaks about the wounded inner child; so get some help and read this book. It’s a good place to start.
April 19, 2024
A tough read! I had to take a few breaks (days/weeks) to process some topics. Great way of presenting it, though.
July 24, 2021
It is wonderful book. The author has a complete grip on the subject. He can well relate the intricacies of the subject with practical wisdom and experience he gained over years of therapy work. This concept has been given by a number of other philosophers especially by Eric Berne, Carl Jung and more recently by Ross Rosenberg, L. Ron Hubbard and even Sigmond Freud the great. But this author has put it plainly, and in an understandable and practice-able way even by a layman. The techniques given are simple. At times practicing same become long, tired and cumbersome process but it is nothing viz the gains of the book. After all, years of wounding need equally long time to heal and there is no magic wand.
The Opening of the book is bombastic. We immediately face our emotionally wounded and dysfunctional tools as soon as we open chapter 1 and the list is exhaustive though author has not claimed so. Then he gives a limited list of functional emotional response tools. He is expert in narrating the complex concepts metaphorically and thus has named part of us who uses this set of dysfunctional tools as child. And again the child is not healthy but wounded and frozen. Very interesting. As we use the same phrase in normal parlance to admonish someone telling him “to grow up” and avoid “childish” things. Author has taken advantage of this deep-rooted idea to the fullest.
Especially giving marks and thus finding age of healing is a good technique but author has not explained what to do specifically once age of wounding has been worked out. Anyway , reader is auto moved towards finding and feeling the impact of each wounding . I also suggest to add another column and jot down impact of each wounding as well to better relate.
The climax is boundaries and types of boundaries. This was a thing I always missed in my life. Resultantly moved from bubble boundary to no boundary and vice versa or from no boundary to rigid boundary. There are a plenty of books available on the subject which readers can refer to for detailed and thorough study but mere reading these three chapters 2,4 and 6 are sufficient to add a quality in life. The idea of boundaries seems crazy to people especially “the nice guys”, true Christians , true Muslims and Buddists fearing appearance as ogre-ish, mean, selfish or bounded for life-long but a deep read of their own relative religions will tell them that this idea has equally been propagated by their very traditions. Being a Muslim, I can quote one verse from the Holly Quran “And god does not like those who cross boundaries (Surah/Chapter 7 Al-aaraf (Heights), Verse 55)”
Another maxima is found when child and adult selves exchange love letter. It is easy and more effective as it puts a lot of things in better perspective than writing self-love letter which is a bit more difficult and appear narcissistic to few.
Revision of book is mandatory as it would multiply impact and again your child will feel more protected, loved, trusted, embraced and owned, connected and finally integrated.
Personally I have felt immense impact of the book. I am feeling relieved, lighter and more connected with my authentic self with a paradigm shift in my perspective of relating to the outer world in a more meaningful way. Thank you MR Robert Jackman
The Opening of the book is bombastic. We immediately face our emotionally wounded and dysfunctional tools as soon as we open chapter 1 and the list is exhaustive though author has not claimed so. Then he gives a limited list of functional emotional response tools. He is expert in narrating the complex concepts metaphorically and thus has named part of us who uses this set of dysfunctional tools as child. And again the child is not healthy but wounded and frozen. Very interesting. As we use the same phrase in normal parlance to admonish someone telling him “to grow up” and avoid “childish” things. Author has taken advantage of this deep-rooted idea to the fullest.
Especially giving marks and thus finding age of healing is a good technique but author has not explained what to do specifically once age of wounding has been worked out. Anyway , reader is auto moved towards finding and feeling the impact of each wounding . I also suggest to add another column and jot down impact of each wounding as well to better relate.
The climax is boundaries and types of boundaries. This was a thing I always missed in my life. Resultantly moved from bubble boundary to no boundary and vice versa or from no boundary to rigid boundary. There are a plenty of books available on the subject which readers can refer to for detailed and thorough study but mere reading these three chapters 2,4 and 6 are sufficient to add a quality in life. The idea of boundaries seems crazy to people especially “the nice guys”, true Christians , true Muslims and Buddists fearing appearance as ogre-ish, mean, selfish or bounded for life-long but a deep read of their own relative religions will tell them that this idea has equally been propagated by their very traditions. Being a Muslim, I can quote one verse from the Holly Quran “And god does not like those who cross boundaries (Surah/Chapter 7 Al-aaraf (Heights), Verse 55)”
Another maxima is found when child and adult selves exchange love letter. It is easy and more effective as it puts a lot of things in better perspective than writing self-love letter which is a bit more difficult and appear narcissistic to few.
Revision of book is mandatory as it would multiply impact and again your child will feel more protected, loved, trusted, embraced and owned, connected and finally integrated.
Personally I have felt immense impact of the book. I am feeling relieved, lighter and more connected with my authentic self with a paradigm shift in my perspective of relating to the outer world in a more meaningful way. Thank you MR Robert Jackman
September 2, 2022
I struggled with this book...I really wanted to learn and grow from it. The problem for me, is I don't have many childhood memories. So, I can't really explore my emotions and feelings if I can't remember what happened...
Because I am already in therapy, I had already done some of the main exercises in the book...Maybe this is a better book for someone who wants to try doing some self healing on their own before trying therapy. Parts of the book were a little repetitive for me.
I am sure if I wasn't already in therapy and I didn't have huge blanks in my childhood, I may have experienced this book differently.
Because I am already in therapy, I had already done some of the main exercises in the book...Maybe this is a better book for someone who wants to try doing some self healing on their own before trying therapy. Parts of the book were a little repetitive for me.
I am sure if I wasn't already in therapy and I didn't have huge blanks in my childhood, I may have experienced this book differently.
July 8, 2023
The first half was really good but the second half felt less researched and more based on his personal experiences.
August 30, 2023
‘Stop je impulsieve reacties, heel je gewonde innerlijke kind’ is de ondertitel van dit boek en dat trekt meteen mijn aandacht. Ik herken die impulsieve reacties namelijk van een aantal jaren geleden. Toen wist ik nog niet wat er tijdens die momenten met me aan de hand was en schaamde ik me heel erg voor mijn reacties. Ik ben zo blij dat er steeds meer aandacht komt voor trauma heling en innerlijk kind werk.
Het fijne aan dit boek vind ik dat het heel veel voorbeelden geeft van impulsieve reacties en ik denk dat iedereen er wel een aantal zal herkennen. Doordat je concrete voorbeelden hebt en kunt herkennen wat voor jou van toepassing is, kun je dus ook heel concreet je eigen pijn en oude verwondingen gaan helen. Dit boek is echt een wegwijzer in hoe je dat kunt doen. Dus ook als je misschien weleens de moed bent verloren, als je ooit hebt gedacht dat dingen niet beter zullen worden, kan dit boek je heel goed helpen. Ik vind het persoonlijk ook fijn dat er veel voorbeeld affirmaties in staan, omdat het soms moeilijk kan zijn om jezelf anders te leren denken.
Ook staan er in dit boek persoonlijke verhalen waar je ook weer herkenning uit kunt halen. Daarnaast laat het je zien dat je niet alleen bent. De auteur deelt ook zijn persoonlijke verhaal en omstandigheden om meer duidelijkheid en herkenning te bieden. Vooral de voorbeeld brieven aan je jongere ik en aan je volwassen zelf vond ik heel mooi om te lezen en echt van toegevoegde waarde.
Mocht je moeite hebben met nee zeggen, grenzen aangeven, of herkennen dat je soms een grotere emotionele reactie hebt dan die eigenlijk nodig is bij de gebeurtenis, dan raad ik dit boek zeker aan!
Het fijne aan dit boek vind ik dat het heel veel voorbeelden geeft van impulsieve reacties en ik denk dat iedereen er wel een aantal zal herkennen. Doordat je concrete voorbeelden hebt en kunt herkennen wat voor jou van toepassing is, kun je dus ook heel concreet je eigen pijn en oude verwondingen gaan helen. Dit boek is echt een wegwijzer in hoe je dat kunt doen. Dus ook als je misschien weleens de moed bent verloren, als je ooit hebt gedacht dat dingen niet beter zullen worden, kan dit boek je heel goed helpen. Ik vind het persoonlijk ook fijn dat er veel voorbeeld affirmaties in staan, omdat het soms moeilijk kan zijn om jezelf anders te leren denken.
Ook staan er in dit boek persoonlijke verhalen waar je ook weer herkenning uit kunt halen. Daarnaast laat het je zien dat je niet alleen bent. De auteur deelt ook zijn persoonlijke verhaal en omstandigheden om meer duidelijkheid en herkenning te bieden. Vooral de voorbeeld brieven aan je jongere ik en aan je volwassen zelf vond ik heel mooi om te lezen en echt van toegevoegde waarde.
Mocht je moeite hebben met nee zeggen, grenzen aangeven, of herkennen dat je soms een grotere emotionele reactie hebt dan die eigenlijk nodig is bij de gebeurtenis, dan raad ik dit boek zeker aan!
July 17, 2023
I found this book extremely useful in helping me understand where my trauma comes from, the many ways trauma can manifest from your childhood, and how to take active steps towards self compassion and healing. A good companion book for the long journey it takes to feeling better - will revisit it periodically when I need the extra support and reminders
February 8, 2024
I hope there will be nothing else in my life that will make me cry as much as this book did. It took a full year to read these 300 pages. A must for anybody wanting to connect with their inner child 💚
October 1, 2023
لا تسري رفاهية المشاكل النفسية للعالم الأول على معاناة ودراما العالم الثالث
July 17, 2023
De intrigerende cover van de overlappende gezichten weet direct mijn aandacht te trekken. Zeker wanneer ik zie waar het boek over gaat ben ik een en al oor. Het lijkt me enorm interessant om meer te leren over je eigen impulsieve reacties en hier wat aan te veranderen. Ik hoop dan ook dat dit boek me een hoop kennis gaat brengen, mooie inzichten gaat geven en bovenal dat er handige tips en handvatten in staan, zodat ik ook met mezelf aan de slag kan. Ik heb hoge verwachtingen.
Wat triggert jou? Waarom handel je op bepaalde momenten zo? Veel mensen kampen met een grote hoeveelheid emotionele pijn die ze al jaren met zich meedragen. Hierdoor voelen ze zich depressief, angstig, een slachtoffer van het leven en teleurgesteld. Dit gevoel leidt tot zelfondermijnende beslissingen. Robert Jackman laat zien waarom we dat doen. Je reageert namelijk vanuit je gewonde innerlijke kind, met negativiteit, isolatie, zelfverwaarlozing, slechte (relatie)keuzes en please gedrag. Robert Jackman leert je hoe je vanuit je authentieke volwassen zelf in de wereld kan staan. Ontdek de bron en tem je triggers.
Direct bij de inleiding weet Robert Jackman me al razend enthousiast, gemotiveerd en nieuwsgierig te maken naar zijn kennis en inzichten. Hij stelt rakende en confronterende vragen die je gelijk aan het denken zetten over je acties en handelingen in het leven.
Robert Jackman heeft een enorm fijne, heldere en toegankelijke schrijfstijl. Hij schrijft erg concreet, duidelijk en weet dingen op simpele en heldere wijze te verwoorden. Zijn verhaal is goed opgebouwd en neemt je mee door het hele proces van bewustwording - opmerken, heling, het stellen van grenzen, verantwoordelijkheid nemen en het verwonde kind integreren. In zijn verhaal wisselt hij zijn kennis en inzichten af met prachtige ervaringsverhalen en super fijne oefeningen. Deze oefeningen variëren van schrijven, tot vragen, tot voelen/observeren. Deze combinatie zorgt ervoor dat zijn uitgelegde kennis direct concreet en in de praktijk wordt uitgelegd. De oefeningen zijn voor mij echt eyeopeners en treffen hun doel.
Ik heb enorm veel inzicht gekregen in mijn eigen gewonde innerlijke kind, waar de triggers zitten en hoe ik hier onbewust mee functioneer in het leven. Door oefeningen heb ik zelf al direct stappen kunnen maken, al is dit natuurlijk een proces dat tijd nodig heeft.
Waarom doe ik zo? Is een erg toegankelijk, vlot geschreven en helder boek, waarbij Robert Jackman je mee neemt van bewustwording tot het aanpakken van het probleem bij de kern. De combinatie van kennis, praktijkverhalen en opdrachten zorgt voor een compleet en volledig boek. Voor iedereen die met zichzelf en oude pijnen aan de slag wil, is dit boek absoluut een aanrader.
Wat triggert jou? Waarom handel je op bepaalde momenten zo? Veel mensen kampen met een grote hoeveelheid emotionele pijn die ze al jaren met zich meedragen. Hierdoor voelen ze zich depressief, angstig, een slachtoffer van het leven en teleurgesteld. Dit gevoel leidt tot zelfondermijnende beslissingen. Robert Jackman laat zien waarom we dat doen. Je reageert namelijk vanuit je gewonde innerlijke kind, met negativiteit, isolatie, zelfverwaarlozing, slechte (relatie)keuzes en please gedrag. Robert Jackman leert je hoe je vanuit je authentieke volwassen zelf in de wereld kan staan. Ontdek de bron en tem je triggers.
Direct bij de inleiding weet Robert Jackman me al razend enthousiast, gemotiveerd en nieuwsgierig te maken naar zijn kennis en inzichten. Hij stelt rakende en confronterende vragen die je gelijk aan het denken zetten over je acties en handelingen in het leven.
Robert Jackman heeft een enorm fijne, heldere en toegankelijke schrijfstijl. Hij schrijft erg concreet, duidelijk en weet dingen op simpele en heldere wijze te verwoorden. Zijn verhaal is goed opgebouwd en neemt je mee door het hele proces van bewustwording - opmerken, heling, het stellen van grenzen, verantwoordelijkheid nemen en het verwonde kind integreren. In zijn verhaal wisselt hij zijn kennis en inzichten af met prachtige ervaringsverhalen en super fijne oefeningen. Deze oefeningen variëren van schrijven, tot vragen, tot voelen/observeren. Deze combinatie zorgt ervoor dat zijn uitgelegde kennis direct concreet en in de praktijk wordt uitgelegd. De oefeningen zijn voor mij echt eyeopeners en treffen hun doel.
Ik heb enorm veel inzicht gekregen in mijn eigen gewonde innerlijke kind, waar de triggers zitten en hoe ik hier onbewust mee functioneer in het leven. Door oefeningen heb ik zelf al direct stappen kunnen maken, al is dit natuurlijk een proces dat tijd nodig heeft.
Waarom doe ik zo? Is een erg toegankelijk, vlot geschreven en helder boek, waarbij Robert Jackman je mee neemt van bewustwording tot het aanpakken van het probleem bij de kern. De combinatie van kennis, praktijkverhalen en opdrachten zorgt voor een compleet en volledig boek. Voor iedereen die met zichzelf en oude pijnen aan de slag wil, is dit boek absoluut een aanrader.
August 20, 2022
It is beyond refreshing to find a book that clearly makes sense of human complexities while inspiring you to go deeper and actually do the work of repairing yourself. I recommend this book for everyone willing and ready to heal and take charge of their destiny against the negative pull of the past. After too many years of suffering through past hurts and traumas while always letting my "old tapes" repeat in my head and create unhealthy patterns, I have finally found the right guide to help me take accountability and above all heighten my self-awareness. This book is not only very well-organized but also retains a welcoming and nurturing feel that helps the inner child find their light and healing despite how difficult the healing process could be at times. This book has definitely expanded my level of self-awareness. It allowed my knowledge of my wounded self, once hidden away in shame, to come alive, while my awareness of what I need to improve in my life has soared. I feel less powerless to the "old tapes" of unhelpful coping patterns and false beliefs I would use to pin myself down in helplessness. My favorite exercise this book offers is the letter-writing exercise. The feelings I got from the exercise and the new insights it revealed stuck with me for days. I will always appreciate this book for showing me in the most organized, reassuring way that I am not helpless to a cycle or condemned or merely unlucky. While I used to want to hide away from past hurt and believe I can simply run away from it, this book helped me overcome my fear of my past and see that you cannot run away from what deeply influenced you, you have to validate the wounded parts and see them for what they are to fully heal and achieve your life goal of living authentically to the fullest. To love yourself is to truly see yourself and all the parts of that whole.
October 22, 2021
Гудридеры в большинстве своём хвалят-не нахвалят эту книгу. А мне она показалась довольно водянистой. К сути метода автор перешёл на 243й странице из 438, а сам метод выглядит сильно зависимым от условных и легко поддающихся изменению производных. Правда, пока читала, было два важных инсайта, так что все не зря.
August 23, 2020
A wise and practical approach to healing and growth.
January 4, 2021
Best self-help position ever read
I had a pleasure to read this book and during the journey finding my own boundaries and authentic self. Recommended among tones of simmilar books.
I had a pleasure to read this book and during the journey finding my own boundaries and authentic self. Recommended among tones of simmilar books.
August 14, 2023
‘Waarom doe ik zo?’ zet je aan het denken en laat je kritisch kijken naar je eigen patronen.
Maak je steeds dezelfde (foute) keuzes? Voel je je telkens somber en angstig? Word je vaak teleurgesteld en ben je het slachtoffer van de situatie? Dit soort patronen heeft vaak hun oorsprong in je jeugd. Met behulp van het boek ‘Waarom doe ik zo?’ ontrafel je stap voor stap de pijn uit het verleden.
Zodra je de inleiding van het boek leest word je geprikkeld om door te lezen. Robert Jackman betrekt je bij het verhaal en laat duidelijke voorbeelden zien. Daarbij maakt hij ook gebruik van diverse situaties. Verschillende aspecten worden aangehaald en nader besproken. Hiermee wordt het ook een heel divers boek en wordt je kennis op verschillende vlakken verbreed.
Robert Jackman zet scherpe zinnen op papier die hun doel behalen. Je wordt aan het denken gezet en leert kritisch naar je eigen patronen te kijken. Dit kan best confronterend zijn, vooral omdat je er eigenlijk nooit over nadenkt of omdat je je er niet van bewust bent. De zelfreflectie vragen bieden veel, nieuwe, inzichten. Deze zetten toe tot het kritisch reflecteren op jezelf en helpen je ook inzichtelijk te krijgen wat jouw triggers zijn.
Het boek heeft een fijne opbouw, elk hoofdstuk leer je steeds een beetje meer. Doordat de informatie gedoseerd wordt gegeven zie je ook de onderliggende verbindingen en sluiten de oefeningen op elkaar aan. Er wordt teruggekeken naar je resultaten van eerdere oefeningen en daar ga je dan weer mee verder. Het boek voelt hierdoor dan ook al een geheel.
Ik kan echt zeggen dat ik mezelf na het lezen van dit boek beter heb leren kennen. Zelf vond ik de oefeningen en dan vooral de zelfreflectie vragen heel interessant. Het waren zaken waar ik nog nooit over na had gedacht, maar achteraf juist heel logisch waren. ‘Waarom doe ik zo?’ is dan ook een boek dat ik er vaker bij ga pakken.
‘Waarom doe ik zo?’ heeft mijn verwachtingen overtroffen en mij nieuwe dingen over mezelf geleerd. Ik geef het boek dan ook *****!
Maak je steeds dezelfde (foute) keuzes? Voel je je telkens somber en angstig? Word je vaak teleurgesteld en ben je het slachtoffer van de situatie? Dit soort patronen heeft vaak hun oorsprong in je jeugd. Met behulp van het boek ‘Waarom doe ik zo?’ ontrafel je stap voor stap de pijn uit het verleden.
Zodra je de inleiding van het boek leest word je geprikkeld om door te lezen. Robert Jackman betrekt je bij het verhaal en laat duidelijke voorbeelden zien. Daarbij maakt hij ook gebruik van diverse situaties. Verschillende aspecten worden aangehaald en nader besproken. Hiermee wordt het ook een heel divers boek en wordt je kennis op verschillende vlakken verbreed.
Robert Jackman zet scherpe zinnen op papier die hun doel behalen. Je wordt aan het denken gezet en leert kritisch naar je eigen patronen te kijken. Dit kan best confronterend zijn, vooral omdat je er eigenlijk nooit over nadenkt of omdat je je er niet van bewust bent. De zelfreflectie vragen bieden veel, nieuwe, inzichten. Deze zetten toe tot het kritisch reflecteren op jezelf en helpen je ook inzichtelijk te krijgen wat jouw triggers zijn.
Het boek heeft een fijne opbouw, elk hoofdstuk leer je steeds een beetje meer. Doordat de informatie gedoseerd wordt gegeven zie je ook de onderliggende verbindingen en sluiten de oefeningen op elkaar aan. Er wordt teruggekeken naar je resultaten van eerdere oefeningen en daar ga je dan weer mee verder. Het boek voelt hierdoor dan ook al een geheel.
Ik kan echt zeggen dat ik mezelf na het lezen van dit boek beter heb leren kennen. Zelf vond ik de oefeningen en dan vooral de zelfreflectie vragen heel interessant. Het waren zaken waar ik nog nooit over na had gedacht, maar achteraf juist heel logisch waren. ‘Waarom doe ik zo?’ is dan ook een boek dat ik er vaker bij ga pakken.
‘Waarom doe ik zo?’ heeft mijn verwachtingen overtroffen en mij nieuwe dingen over mezelf geleerd. Ik geef het boek dan ook *****!
June 15, 2023
Great book for introducing the concept of our inner child. I had a lot of "aha" moments while reading, and came away with a fresh perspective on why I have the cognitive/emotional challenges I do as well as how to work on them.
Pros: There are lots of "practice exercises" in the book, great personal examples from the author and his clients, and a straightforward introduction to healing your inner child.
Cons: Because of the nature of being an introductory book, it doesn't go as in-depth on these concepts and I wouldn't recommend it as a stand-alone guide. It'd probably be best paired with therapy or other types of cognitive healing/work.
Overall, this is definitely a book I'll be returning to as I work on improving myself and training my mental health. Would recommend for anyone who wants to begin improving the way they react and respond to the world around them.
Pros: There are lots of "practice exercises" in the book, great personal examples from the author and his clients, and a straightforward introduction to healing your inner child.
Cons: Because of the nature of being an introductory book, it doesn't go as in-depth on these concepts and I wouldn't recommend it as a stand-alone guide. It'd probably be best paired with therapy or other types of cognitive healing/work.
Overall, this is definitely a book I'll be returning to as I work on improving myself and training my mental health. Would recommend for anyone who wants to begin improving the way they react and respond to the world around them.
August 27, 2023
Where do I begin? This book is absolutely amazing. I read through this without having any expectations on what to expect, and I found a great deal of healing by participating in the activities and taking my time to work through each segment. Trust me, take you time, and go through it at your own pace. I plan to keep doing the activities in this book to help me with my ongoing healing from those deep trauma wounds that were created in childhood. It takes a great deal of courage to be willing to take accountability of your own healing, and it takes a great deal of bravery to face those experiences that created a lifetime of triggers and emotional responses. If you are ready to take that journey, this is well worth your time.
November 19, 2023
Cand te vindeci de panica si anxietate exagerata incepi sa te vindeci de tot, iti doresti o solutie permanenta, iar asta se obtine si din ideea de a te cunoaste extrem de bine, eu nu ma cunosc asa ca am apelat la cartea din fata mea. Ideea de copil interior o cunosc de multa vreme dar pana acum nu am actionat, insa este timpul.
Este o carte extrem de buna cu exemple, exercitii si povestiri ale clientilor lui Robert Jackman. Cu siguranta voi achizitiona si cartea lui de exercitii practice. Insa cumva am inteles de unde imi pleaca gandirea limitativa in anumite privinte. Cartiile de gen mai mult te ajuta sa te descoperi si te indeamna sa privesti in interiorul tau. Recomand.
Este o carte extrem de buna cu exemple, exercitii si povestiri ale clientilor lui Robert Jackman. Cu siguranta voi achizitiona si cartea lui de exercitii practice. Insa cumva am inteles de unde imi pleaca gandirea limitativa in anumite privinte. Cartiile de gen mai mult te ajuta sa te descoperi si te indeamna sa privesti in interiorul tau. Recomand.
September 20, 2021
Really excellent guide to self-healing. The vignettes of his clients are helpful, and he clearly states the limits of this practice (for example, those with SUD will need to participate in focused programs). It’s a great place to start for those who know that their childhood has a great hold over them in the present moment but don’t quite know where to begin. The exercises are a very gentle approach but really help coax out what you need to know about yourself to heal in a way that makes developmental sense. I think this is a great supplemental resource to therapy.
August 16, 2021
This book is a must-read for anyone who feels like they can't control their emotions at any point in time. If you find yourself reacting in strange ways, then this may be what psychotherapist Robert Jackman defines as "impulsive reactions."
He provides ways to deal with these impulsive reactions which were nice to read. I'd say I learned a little more about myself by the end of this book, as well as some ways I could help fix my thoughts when I start to think negatively for no solid reason.
He provides ways to deal with these impulsive reactions which were nice to read. I'd say I learned a little more about myself by the end of this book, as well as some ways I could help fix my thoughts when I start to think negatively for no solid reason.
March 19, 2024
One of the top 3 best self therapy books l've ever read.
The exercises are uncomfortable at times, but the breakthroughs are significant. I cried wholeheartedly more than a few times. Both tears of sadness and of joy.
The exercises have allowed me to feel closer to my inner child and to know my traumas more intimately. Thanks to this book I have gotten a taste of what it feels like to feel safe in my body.
The exercises are uncomfortable at times, but the breakthroughs are significant. I cried wholeheartedly more than a few times. Both tears of sadness and of joy.
The exercises have allowed me to feel closer to my inner child and to know my traumas more intimately. Thanks to this book I have gotten a taste of what it feels like to feel safe in my body.
May 5, 2022
This is one of the most (if not the most) positively impactful book I've read. Doing the exercises was a must for me to get value out of this book, especially the letter writing. It also was necessary for me to step away a few times and come back to it. It required a lot of emotional energy and sometimes I needed to regain that energy back before continuining.
August 30, 2022
I wanted to listen first to the audio book and it was inspiring! I will be picking up the actual work book and redoing this. I think that the comfort of hearing the audio version made it easier to take in for the emotional work ahead. This book really breaks down each principle to help you get to the inner workings in our minds through self reflection, exercises, exc.
May 8, 2023
Reading it once is not enough, as the book is a self-awareness and healing guide with explanatory exercises and many examples taken from therapeutical reality. Easy to follow and apply, this book is a long journey with you to understand and recover the inner wounded child. Has the power to take deep inside your thoughts and bring to surface explanations to reactions.
February 28, 2024
It's not a bad book, and for people who have experienced more serious trauma or feel really shackled in their own lives I think it's a useful read.
It taught me some things, but didn't impact me that much, thankfully, I would say.
It has some really cool feelings charts and exercises in the book that are nice to do.
It taught me some things, but didn't impact me that much, thankfully, I would say.
It has some really cool feelings charts and exercises in the book that are nice to do.
May 18, 2021
This is the single most valuable book I’ve ever read. I cannot say thank you enough, Robert Jackman, for your life story and for your gentle spirit that lead me through this book. I am a changed person because of you. Thank you.
November 30, 2021
Therapy in a form of a book. The chapters in the middle can be a little too confrontational and much to handle, especially the exercises mentioned about re-living childhood trauma, but pushing through was so worth it. Many life lessons learned.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 52 reviews