In defence of gatekeeping

While many brands still view ‘going viral’ as a golden ticket to success, it’s becoming ever clearer that blowing up on social media is both a blessing and a curse. Take the Columbia Road carols: last year, one of London’s most famous public carol services was cancelled due to public safety fears after going viral on TikTok and more than 7,000 people piled into Columbia Road. Or take Adidas Spezials, the colourful trainers which went viral online last year and have been near-impossible to get your hands on ever since.

These are only a few examples of many. Anyone who has scrolled through an influencer’s TikTok comments section has likely seen firsthand the way viewers frequently demand to have the exact product codes and direct links for items. Whether they have 10,000 followers or 100, creators often find themselves inundated with these requests, responding tirelessly to comment after comment inquiring after everything from where they got their bedside table to the name of their nail colour. When users choose not to share this information, they're accused of gatekeeping – a heinous crime in the eyes of the internet.

The term “gatekeeping” traditionally refers to the control of access to resources, power, or opportunities, often at an institutional level. However, its meaning has evolved in the digital age to mean withholding information about virtually anything. In recent years, gatekeeping has been criticised for being elitist, and so much content is created to challenge gatekeeping: today it seems as though users sharing product recommendations for outfits, skincare routines and home finds is the bread and butter of my algorithm.

Of course, ‘recommendation culture’ is nothing new. “One of the things you have to bear in mind is that we’ve always wanted recommendations, pre-social media as well,” says Kate Nightingale, consumer and fashion psychologist and founder of Humanising Brands. This desire for recommendations stems from our need for social acceptance and belonging. “Historically, we’ve done this as normal human beings – through chatting with a friend or stopping someone on the street. It’s just that now it’s on steroids.”

@sashie_m Its uniform at this point #adidassambas #adidasspezial #londonfits #londonunderground #pov #fyp ♬ Jack Harlow Lovin On me - Tfresh David

The move away from brick-and-mortar stores and in-print style magazines means shopping has become a pursuit which predominantly takes place online. In theory, this should be more efficient, with the ready availability of recommendations saving us from wasting time and money. In reality, however, ‘analysis paralysis’ is turning shopping for something as simple as a pair of socks into a Herculean task. Now every purchase, no matter how mundane, has the potential to become a holy grail.

The endless options and accessibility of products means we have become reliant on recommendations to narrow things down. Many of us are also hardwired to blend into the crowd, Nightingale adds. “If you consider openness to experiences on the Big Five personality traits, individuals who score high on this trait will naturally seek out new experiences and information,” she explains. “Those with lower scores will prefer to stick to what they know. They will love that echo chamber.”

While there’s nothing wrong with wanting to make sure your money is well spent, feeling entitled to know everything about strangers online getting bit weird. As we have seen, when recommendation culture goes too far, we are left with everyone wearing the item-of-the-moment and queuing down the street for a seat at the latest viral coffee spot just to recreate a photo they’ve seen on someone’s Instagram grid. “Just copying others means that you are not really self-aware,” explains Nightingale. “You essentially want to do things that you know will supposedly get you similar success, appreciation, or beauty. It’s this almost illusory belief that this top will make you more beautiful.”

“When we are all living the same life, where is the room left for self-expression?”

We’re now living in the influencer era, a time where fashion’s subcultures have been distilled into fleeting microtrends and previously hidden gems now see people travelling across town to stand in hour-long queues just to buy a cinnamon bun. Everything has become highly commodifiable, with our feeds serving up the same looks, products and places repeatedly until the algorithm decides it’s time to move onto the next. But when we are all living the same life, where is the room left for self-expression?

This culture is also causing us to over-identify with our purchases, with consumers using what’s in their shopping bags to cultivate a sense of identity and seek social validation: take the House of Sunny Hockney Dress, Sol de Janeiro’s Brazilian Bum Bum Cream, or the Stanley Quencher cup. “Everything that we buy is pretty much symbolism driven,” says Nightingale. “This is connected with something called enclosed cognition, which indicates what we [consume] affects our emotions and way of thinking based on the subconscious associations we hold with those items.”

@hedaily1 Finally trying out the viral popular bakery spot in London, Toad bakery 🤍 #london #londonlife #londonvlog #fyp #londonhotspots #londonbakery ♬ From The Start Laufey - chris(ur fav Lauver)

Unfortunately, we can’t overconsume our way to self-actualisation. If anything, trying to keep up with the latest trends is hindering our ability to discover our true identities. The beauty of personal style is that it is personal. The beauty of a hidden gem is that it is hidden. Keeping things to yourself is not always a selfish act and socially-enforced oversharing is not always a good thing.

Relying on recommendations also takes away the gratifying high of discovering something new and unique. Delayed gratification feels good: when we are immediately able to sate our wants by buying the same products or visiting the same spots as someone we have seen online, it inhibits our ability to resist the temptation of an immediate reward. “In that echo chamber, we’re not at the place of actually challenging themselves and growing, which, let’s face it, a lot of people in the world aren’t,” says Nightingale. “Copying is much easier.”

But we should try to resist the urge to do whatever everyone else is doing – and take pride in our individuality. Embracing a bit of gatekeeping encourages us to explore our tastes and rekindle the fun of discovery: trust yourself to try a new spot without relying on a list of recommendations or buy something simply because you like it. And if someone asks where it’s from, there’s no shame in keeping your cards close to your chest.