My reality TV of choice at the moment? It has to be the latest series of Love Is Blind – a Netflix show that I could chatter about for an age. Normally, that chat consists of which couples I think are the best suited, or heartwarming moments such as Johnie and Chris rekindling their love (controversial, I know) but while watching season 5 I saw a display of toxic masculinity that was so veiled it made me rewind.
Said moment was between one of the show's contestants, JP (whose real name is Jared Pierce) and his fiancé, Taylor Rue, where the former commented on her makeup choices.
In the second of the four-part release of this season (aired 29 September, 2023), we saw the couples take to their honeymoons in Mexico, post-pod proposals. And while you'd think this holiday would be all about relaxing and bonding, JP and Taylor struggled to connect on a deeper level.
In episode five (named: Don't Give Up on Me), we saw the two endure some awkward silences, which they discussed with one another and said they would attempt to overcome.
But, after some back and forth, 32-year-old JP then confessed that he felt his 25-year-old wife-to-be was "fake". Here's how their entire convo went down – albeit condensed for clarity:
JP: "I understand that you tried to present yourself and look as best you could but I feel like if you were to present yourself like this, without any makeup, it would have been better. It felt like you were fake."
Taylor: "That's why the communication has been off and different because I felt fake?"
JP: "That's what started it off. You had a caked-up face, fake eyelashes. I'm being honest and I'm sorry that's so hard to hear. You presented fake stuff."
Taylor: "I just dressed up and put on makeup."
JP: "A lot of makeup. I had makeup all over my jacket."
Taylor: "You didn't even know what I looked like and I wanted to feel and look my best for the first time seeing you. Women put on makeup because they want to feel pretty. A lot of girls and women do that."
JP: "When I first saw you and you had all this stuff on I was like 'Well, is this going to be an everyday thing?' 'Am I going to have to deal with this?' ... Like you putting on a face, like you're literally putting on a totally different face. And I was like 'Well, that's not really what I want'. I want this face."
Taylor: "So when I walked out it f*cked you up so bad you don't know how to communicate?"
JP: "Yes! How is that a bad answer? That's the truth. Just don't wear makeup!"
Taylor: "I'm going to do what I want to do. You're not going to tell me what to do and the whole makeup thing is just so bad."
JP: "You don't need it. I was like 'That's not a real person'. But if you looked like this, I would love it."
*Takes a minute to gather thoughts*
Now, while I'm not for cancel culture and/or boycotting by the court of public opinion, after my initial stun, to put it quite simply, I realised how important this discussion really is and why it needed to be heard by all.
As it seems, there's still the worrying rhetoric being put out there that a man's personal preference of what they find attractive should impact what women do with their own faces. It represents the toxic view that men should be able to have a say in what their partner does with their appearance (when it's absolutely none of their business).
[Though, to note, makeup wearing has also become much more fluid and genderless, too. Drag performers are some of the key forces behind the art form of makeup, dating back to the 16th century when it first became synonymous with cisgender men – would you believe, JP? Since then, the art of painting oneself has, ofc, evolved and in more ways than one; There are now a whole host of people (men, women and non-binary folk included) taking to the expressive form of makeup.]This certainly stirred up fan reactions and viewers of the show took to X (formerly Twitter) to also share their thoughts.
To JP, let me first begin by posing the following question: Why would you – someone who has such strong, superficial preferences on beauty – apply to a show like Love Is Blind? I mean, isn't the entire premise and concept of the 'experiment' to ditch your physical desires at the door and find love 'sight unseen'?
While, fairly, feelings can't be helped, what can be helped is judgement and bigotry when it comes to people wearing makeup. What someone does with their own face and body shouldn't arise at all for debate or scrutiny, so, it's exhausting that I'm even having to type this out or even deal with these sorts of views still being aired today in the 21st century. And to hundreds of thousands, if not millions of viewers globally, too.
But there are plenty of reasons why people choose to wear make-up and no, JP, for the benefit of men is not high up there.
Makeup is an art form and can be used as a tool for creativity and self-expression. Just take the recent spring/summer 2024 Fashion Week shows as a prime example; makeup and hair are used as accessories to dress up or down fashion looks – the two go hand in hand. It embodies one's personality and can be used to exude thought and feeling.
Not only that but others may wear and use makeup to boost confidence and enhance their natural beauty. I, for example, often reach for foundation and concealer products to cover up blemishes, acne marks and hyperpigmentation. This not only makes me feel like my best self but allows me to reimagine what I want to put across to the world. It's my personal decision, just as someone else might feel like their best self with no make-up on at all.
Decisions surrounding our personal appearance are individual and ever-changing. For this reason, and many others, wearing a lot of make-up does not make someone 'fake' – in fact, my love of make-up and expressing myself through it is similar to how I love to let people know what television shows I like to watch, how I spend my weekend, or the way in which I choose to style my hair.
To that, I ask, do all of these personal choices make us 'fake'? Shall we all just strip and bare all in such cases to ensure that what we outwardly present is our untouched, unstyled selves? Spoiler: The answer is no on both fronts. Instead, it's a part of my personality that I am proud of and will continue to share.
As I'm sure we all know, sadly, this archaic rhetoric on why people choose to wear makeup isn't new. 'Reasons why I have trust issues' and 'Take her swimming on the first date' are just a couple of the memes that have circulated on the net for years, usually from men reposting videos of women's before-and-after beauty transformations. These pointed posts insinuate that the subjects in them look totally different to their makeup-free selves. But as repeatedly said, these makeup choices aren't for anyone else to decide or comment on – and not only that but beauty is more than just skin deep!
So, why, as a society haven't we moved on from this? Why do we still need to remind people that a person's decision to wear, or not wear make-up, isn't for male – or anyone's – approval but an individual choice?
Ultimately and evidently we need to continue to remind people who hold these views that beauty products – whether it be makeup, fake tan, hair extensions etc. etc. – do not make someone 'fake'. Yes, we all have physical preferences but that does not give anyone the right to tell someone what to do. I am the same me, mascara or not.
Now, don't mind me while I go top up my lippy. Mwah.
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Lia Mappoura (she/her) is the Beauty Assistant at Cosmopolitan UK. Covering everything from viral celebrity hair and makeup news to the latest trend predictions, she’s an expert in recognising the season’s next big beauty look (before it ends up all over your social media feeds). You’ll usually find her putting TikTok’s recent beauty hacks to the Hype Test, challenging the gender-makeup binary and social stereotypes, or fangirling over the time Kourtney Kardashian viewed her Instagram Story (yes, it’s true). Find her also on
