When my partner and I moved into our first apartment together a couple of years ago, one of the first pieces of furniture we bought was a vintage dining table that could extend to seat up to 12 people. Nothing brings me more joy than having friends over for dinner, and I knew I wanted this table to be a central space for creating memories in our home.
Our first fall in that apartment, we hosted a Friendsgiving potluck in early November with a big group of close friends. Because it was my first large party in my own space, I went big: I sent proper invitations, and I even had a spreadsheet tracking each dish people were bringing. (There was roast duck and mushroom Wellington, three salads, and two kinds of potatoes.) It’s now become the dinner party I look forward to hosting all year, in part because I’ve learned how to host and enjoy myself at the same time. Here are some of my go-to hosting tips for how to make your next dinner party feel extra special—and, more importantly, relaxed. You deserve it.
Have a go-to wine
Most of my friends offer to bring a bottle of wine or two to a dinner party, but that leaves a lot up to chance: The wine might not be chilled, or it might not be what you want to serve with the food. So instead of asking everyone to bring a bottle, I ask people to bring other things—flowers, a loaf of good bread, dessert—and then I select the wine myself. My wine of choice is something that's crowd-pleasing, memorable, and pairs with any menu, such as Cloudy Bay Sauvignon Blanc. You can never have too many bottles, because any extras will be on hold to kick-start the next party.
Don’t be afraid to delegate
The last thing I want to do at my own dinner party is stress over whether I have enough ice for drinks or gripe about the music—I want to enjoy myself, and you should, too! I always find my friends are eager to help, and over the years, I’ve learned to delegate anything and everything I can. I like to ask a few friends to pick up something en route to my home, whether that’s a bag of ice for chilling wine or mixing cocktails or some nice olives to add to an appetizer spread. I’ll ask a musically inclined friend to come over early and pick out music to play throughout the night. The sum total becomes something we’ve created together, and the evening is all the more meaningful because of it.
Set the mood
No matter the occasion, I like my dinner table to feel special but not stuffy or overly formal. For instant drama, I love to light a mix of candles of varying shapes, widths, and heights, such as tiny tea lights interspersed with tall candlesticks and low votives. I love small arrangements of seasonal flowers on the table, but even better is a mix of seasonal fruits, such as satsumas or pears on the branch, which double as both décor and dessert. For larger groups, I also like to create a dedicated beverage station, where I’ll set out a few bottles of wine in a big bucket of ice, cocktail fixings, and glasses, so my guests know to feel at home and help themselves.
Have snacks ready to go
I like to set out a few snacks on my kitchen island for all of us to enjoy with cocktails or a bit of wine before we sit down to dinner. I like the casual tone it sets for the night, and I like to keep my snacks super simple to match. These can be as easy as sliced cucumber spears tossed with a little salt and chile flakes, halved radishes with good bread and butter, or warm dates drizzled with honey and topped with flaky sea salt. When in doubt, I always reach for a never-fail yogurt dip (a mix of full-fat Greek yogurt, salt, pepper, lemon juice, and a grated garlic clove) to serve with sliced vegetables and sturdy crackers.
Send guests home with leftovers
I used to think my chronic habit of preparing too much food for dinner parties was a bad thing—until I realized everyone’s favorite part of the evening was finding there was enough food for all to take some home at the end of the night. (Ask people to bring their own reusable food storage containers!) It’s a great way to make sure leftovers don’t go to waste, and it stretches the party vibes into the next day.