Hugh Hefner‘s widow Crystal can’t believe her husband is no longer here.
“I haven’t been able to bring myself to write most people back to thank them for their condolences. I am heartbroken. I am still in disbelief,” the 31-year-old told People on Monday in her first statement since Hefner’s death.
The Playboy founder died on Wednesday at the age of 91 and was laid to rest in a private service on Saturday.
“He was an American hero. A pioneer. A kind and humble soul who opened up his life and home to the world,” said Crystal, a previous Playboy cover girl. “I felt how much he loved me. I loved him so much. I am so grateful. He gave me life. He gave me direction. He taught me kindness. I will feel eternally grateful to have been by his side, holding his hand, and telling him how much I love him. He changed my life, he saved my life. He made me feel loved every single day.”
Crystal, who married the iconic publisher in 2012, was his third wife. He was previously married to Millie Williams, with whom he shared children David and Christie, and Playboy model Kimberley Conrad, the mother of his children Cooper and Marston. Hefner and Conrad officially divorced in 2010.