There’s a lot we didn’t know about Amy Poehler — until now.
The actress opens up in her new book “Yes Please,” which hits stores Oct. 28, and reveals everything from her relationships with ex-husband Will Arnett and her new beau, Nick Kroll, to doling out sex tips and recalling her past drug use.
1. On Pregnancy: “I have the Angelina Jolie of Vaginas.”
Poehler, 43, recounts the story of her first pregnancy and how her doctor died the night before her due date in 2008 from a heart attack in his sleep. She was rehearsing a “Mad Men” parody with Jon Hamm at the time.
“I cried and cried in my ‘Mad Men’ dress. Jon Hamm held me by the shoulders and looked at me and said, ‘I know this is very sad, but this is a really important show for me, so I’m going to need you to get your s–t together.'”
That night she went home and said that she put on “Law & Order” before bed. “I heard the ‘bam bam’ sound effect in the opening credits and my water broke,” she said.
2. On her divorce from Will Arnett: “Imagine spreading everything you care about on a blanket and then tossing the whole thing up in the air.”
For the first time, the “Parks and Recreation” star opens up about her ex-husband, Arnett, 44. The couple who announced their divorce in 2012, have stayed silent on the topic because “it is too sad and too personal.”
She added, “I don’t like people knowing my s–t.”
“I am proud of how my ex-husband, Will, and I have been taking care of our children; I am beyond grateful he is their father; and I don’t think a ten-year marriage constitutes failure,” Poehler explains. “That being said, getting a divorce really sucks. but as my dear friend and relationship sponsor Louis C.K. has noted, ‘Divorce is always good news because no good marriage has ever ended in divorce.'”
3. On Drugs: “Cocaine is terrific if you want to hang out with people you don’t know very well and play Ping-Pong all night. It’s bad for almost everything else.”
In her “Obligatory Drug Stories, or Lessons I Learned on Mushrooms” chapter, Poehler goes into short detail about her drug past. She explains that she’s tried drugs, but never meth or heroin. She describes her experiences with cocaine, ecstasy and marijuana.
“The day after cocaine is rough,” she says. “Same with ecstasy. I remember a wonderful ‘UCB’ New Year’s Eve party where we all danced and drank water and loved each other. I also remember the next day when I thought I had no friends and I was so sad I wanted to sink into the carpet and permanently live there.”
When it came to pot, the star admitted that she spent a year as a stoner. “I would smoke in the morning and listen to Bob Marley. I would wear headphones and buy records and comic books. I would make mac and cheese while watching ‘Deep Space Nine.'”
4. On Nick Kroll: “Thank you to Nick Kroll, who encourages me in all the right ways.”
Poehler even opens up about her current boyfriend, “The League” star Kroll, and how he helps her with stress and sleep.
“I have a boyfriend who knows how to settle me. He puts his hand on my chest and tells me boring stories,” she reveals about the 36-year-old. “On one of our first nights together I woke up apologizing for my snoring and he pulled out the two earplugs he had worn to bed so that he could hear what I was saying. It was one of the most romantic gestures I have ever seen.”
5. On Sex: “We don’t need it to last as long as you think. Hurry up. We are so tired.”
Titled “My World-Famous Sex Advice,” the “SNL” alum offers tips to both men and women.
Some of the advice is simple and obvious like “Don’t have sex with people you don’t want to have sex with,” while other tips are straight from the heart like, “Be nice, tell your woman she is hot, never shame her, and never hurt her.”
6. On “SNL” secrets: “Matthew McConaughey wore a sarong in Lorne‘s office, I danced at a club with Christina Aguilera and Antonio Banderas smelled the best of any host.”
In a chapter dedicated to her time on “Saturday Night Live,” Poehler thanks Lorne Michaels saying, “I love him and will always be grateful for the huge opportunities he gave me and continues to give me.”
She recalls memories from humping Justin Timberlake in a sketch to spending a lot of time crying “from exhaustion, stress … and the bitter burn of rejection.”