"I take orders from the Octoboss."

The Archives

  • Hey bud, thanks for reading.

    Don't feel obligated, but here are some

  • WAYS YOU CAN SUPPORT THE SHIT OUT OF VERN & OUTLAWVERN.COM

    if that's your thing:

  • 1. Patreon

    Toss me a couple bucks a month, support the good shit, also get access to a bunch of exclusive writing. This is my primary source of writing money that has allowed me to cut down to part time at the day job. Thank you!

  • 2. Buy my books from your local bookseller or somebody

    click here for my Amazon author page

    (NOTE: My ten year contract has passed on the Titan books, so I don't get residuals on them like I do WORM ON A HOOK and NIKETOWN, but I would love for you to read them because I'm proud of them)

    EXTRA CREDIT: Review them on Amazon! That would really help me out. Unless you didn't like them, in which case forget I said anything.

  • 3. If you ever buy from Amazon, go through my links or search engines



    (you pay the same amount you were gonna pay anyway they cut me a little slice)

  • I also have an Amazon UK one:

    (I can't get the search box widget to work anymore, so click on MOONWALKER and then search for what you want.)

  • 4. My exciting line of fashion and leisure products

    (I get a couple bucks per item, you get a cool t-shirt, mug or lifestyle item)

  • 5. Spread the word

    Tell your friends about my reviews and my books and everything. Only cool people though please, we don't need a bunch of suckers and/or chumps around here.

    THANKS EVERYBODY. YOUR FRIEND, VERN

    * * * *

  • Recent commentary and jibber-jabber

    • Franchise Fred on City Slickers II: The Legend of Curly’s Gold: “IIRC the epilogue was a reshoot. The original ending was just they find out Curly’s map was for the theme…” Jul 5, 13:58
    • CJ Holden on Baby’s Day Out: “I too have to semi-defend DENNIS (Also only that in Germany, but I guess because DENNIS DIE BEDROHUNG doesn’t rhyme…” Jul 5, 00:06
    • Pacman2.0 on Baby’s Day Out: “It’s just called DENNIS in the UK for those reasons BTW, same with the DIC cartoon (which muted the lyrics…” Jul 4, 23:07
    • Pacman2.0 on Baby’s Day Out: “I would mildly defend the DENNIS THE MENACE along the following lines; – It does a nice enough job of…” Jul 4, 23:02
    • Pacman2.0 on I Love Trouble: “Glaive, I just want to say I appreciate the effort, even if we’re probably not going to be able to…” Jul 4, 22:36
    • Dreadguacamole on Baby’s Day Out: “I have no idea how it did in the box office, but this had a *huge* marketing push in Argentina;…” Jul 4, 17:27
    • PJ Audenzia on Baby’s Day Out: “#CrowWatch2K24 sees Vern keeping a log of the various ways that Baby’s Day Out and The Flintstones etc are very…” Jul 4, 14:06
    • Glaive Robber on Baby’s Day Out: “FYI, Happy Fourth, America! Might be our last! Turns out, Patrick Reed Johnson has been talking about Baby’s Day Out…” Jul 4, 14:04
    • Glaive Robber on I Love Trouble: “Meant to post this instead https://www.nytimes.com/1999/05/28/movies/tv-weekend-the-ayn-rand-cliffs-notes-philosophy-as-foreplay.html” Jul 4, 11:50
    • Glaive Robber on I Love Trouble: “This may or may not confirm my 98%, but I’m pretty sure this was it! https://www.tvtango.com/series/abc_saturday_night_at_the_movies/episodes/sort/episode/type/desc?filters%5Bday%5D=&filters%5Bseason%5D=&filters%5Bbroadcast%5D=All&filters%5Bmedia%5D=&commit=&page=5 1999. I remember the…” Jul 4, 11:48
    • CJ Holden on Baby’s Day Out: “BTW, I can only imagine that the director’s cut includes more John Neville. He is mute in most of his…” Jul 4, 07:32
    • CJ Holden on Baby’s Day Out: “Napoleon, if you are thinking about MOUSE HUNT, that one is neither forgotten nor was it bad. This and BABY’S…” Jul 4, 07:24
    • Glaive Robber on Baby’s Day Out: “This review WAS amazing. And then at the end, the discovery of a “Baby’s Day Out” videogame??? NEXT LEVEL SHIT.” Jul 4, 06:37
    • Dreadguacamole on The Debt Collector: “Having watched this for the third time (still great!) there are a couple of things I wanted to mention: -…” Jul 4, 06:11
    • Napoleon Nitroglycerin on Baby’s Day Out: “Oh, God, I mercifully forgot about this, until now. And now I remember… I remember looking at the VHS cover…” Jul 4, 03:51

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