The small talk ‘ick’ this millennial wants banned
“What do you do for work?”
In Australia, the question ‘What do you do for work?’ is a classic icebreaker, right up there with ‘How good is the weather?’.
However, one Aussie sparked a conversation by expressing her frustration with the question.
Queenslander Llani Belle, 29, has taken to social media to reveal that she doesn’t think the question should be considered normal.
Ms Belle said she knows sometimes the question is asked with no malice, but she feels it’s often asked so people can “judge you” and she isn’t prepared to answer it anymore.
“I just decided my only answer to this question moving forward is that I’m doing my best,” she said.
Ms Belle is all for “female empowerment” and doesn’t want to downplay her success. She’s proud of everything she’s achieved and the fact she makes six figures a year, but she wants to move away from hustle culture and being defined by a job.
“I just want to be less identified by my career,” she told news.com.au.
Ms Belle said that Australians “focus” far too much on what people do for a living and treat you differently based on your occupation.
Sure, on the surface, it seems like a question you’d ask when you’re scratching around to find something to talk about, but Ms Belle believes it’s also an easy way for people to decide if someone’s worth talking to.
When you ask someone what they do for a living, you can also assume what tax bracket they fit into and, therefore, what class they belong to.
Ms Belle has worked in luxury real estate as an agent and for influencer Kayla Itsines’ fitness app Sweat, and she’s always felt her careers sound cool in a social setting and she doesn’t like the way she’s treated because of it.
“I’ve always had very impressive careers, but I still don’t enjoy the conversation, and the way that how I am treated has changed after I’ve said what company I work for,” she said.
The young Aussie said that she’s watched as people’s “eyes light up” when she’s mentioned what she does for a living.
“It is because it is associated with a lot of money and people’s opinions change,” she explained.
It is not a reaction she likes.
“I get the ick from the way people treat me differently because of what I do for work,” she said.
Ms Belle sees this play-out socially when one of her friends, who works as a full-time barista, reveals what he does for a living.
“People turn their nose up at him,” she said.
She finds this kind of response “yuck” and it makes her unimpressed when people are overly enthusiastic about her career because she feels like it plays into the idea that your value should be determined by how much you make or what you do.
“I judge people on if they are good people or not. I’ve met successful people that are horrible,” she said.
She hopes this question will stop being asked so often because Gen Zers and Millennials are starting to reject career culture.
“We are going out of this phase of hustle culture and people want to have a life and a job. As we transition out of that, I’d love to have the conversation focused around our lives more,” she explained.
People online were quick to weigh in on Ms Belle’s job question.
“I absolutely think it is to judge and categorise you by your job,” one person wrote.
“How you spend your time is a better question,” another shared.
“It is to determine how much respect they’ll show you,” another said.
“Personal questions seem like small talk in Australia. I can’t stand it. I will not answer your question and will change the subject. That’s how I handle it,” someone else claimed.
“I personally think there’s absolutely nothing wrong with asking that. If you do, it’s you who has the issue. Maybe it’s a job you’re embarrassed over or no job,” one wrote.
“Only people who contribute [nothing] to society don’t like answering that question. Our work absolutely does define you as it’s what you dedicate most of your life to,” one said.
