The ‘Orange peel theory’ claims to prove how much your partner really cares — here’s how the trendy relationship test works
Can you peel the love tonight?
Curious couples hoping to find out how much their partners really care are putting their relationships to the test — using the suddenly viral “orange peel theory.”
Popularized on TikTok, the theory claims that when your other half performs a small act of service, something that you are capable of doing on your own, like peeling an orange, without being asked, their action reveals how well they know you — and how likely they are to take care of you now and in the future.
This could play out with your partner choosing to peel your orange because they know you hate getting sticky citrus juice all over your fingers, or because they don’t want you to get sick and want to make it one step easier for you to load up on Vitamin C.
The hashtag #orangepeeltheory has already amassed 25.5 million views on the popular social media site, as people around the world share the small ways they’ve discovered how much their partner cares.
In one viral video, a woman named Jenna shared how her boyfriend showed his love for her — simply by running to the grocery store.
The avid baker explained that she had recently been complaining about her ongoing struggle to successfully separate egg whites and yolks while working, due to her long nails. His response — to bring her a supply of both, already separated — reduced her to tears.
“It was honestly just a little rant that I didn’t think he paid much attention to (bc it wasn’t a big deal just a lil moment of frustration) But he saw me!” Jenna noted in her video.
“Never thought egg whites would make me cry.”
On the less heartwarming side of things, one Reddit user revealed how the theory led her to break up with her boyfriend. The woman said that she asked her partner of seven months to do a few simple favors like tying her hair up and putting her towel in the dryer to warm it up, both of which he questioned and did not do.
“The method worked and made me see that I do a lot more for him than he does for me,” the woman said.
“Our relationship is not going to end because of my towel not being warm or my hair not being up, but because I realize that I am just settling for a lazy man.”
She explained that the test led her to notice the imbalance in her relationship as her partner takes advantage of all she does for him without returning the favor.
“These problems are foreshadowing what’s to come and I see no future with him,” she concluded.
One relationship expert pointed out that the “orange peel theory” can be an insightful exercise.
“A partner’s reaction to the request of peeling an orange can provide some insights into how they show up to a relationship,” noted Amber Brooks, editor-in-chief of DatingAdvice.com. “Are they a pleaser, a yes man, a can-do, hard-working, orange-peeling support person? Or do they question your motives? Do they feel too busy or too stressed to offer help? These questions matter beyond the small task of peeling an orange, and it is good for couples to think along these lines if they are serious about making a commitment and building a life together.”
However, she also cautions that “some people have off days,” and so the choice to peel or not “isn’t a long-term statement of character by any means. This is just one data point for daters to consider as they determine if their partner can meet their needs, from breakfast and beyond.”
Some have pointed out that the theory can be applied to just about any relationship, romantic or not — from colleagues to teachers to best friends, it’s an easy way to find out who’s going to be there in a crisis.
In one TikTok video a teacher justified that he happily ties his students’ shoes for them, writing that it’s “a beautiful little act of love and kindness.”
Meanwhile, acts of service are one of the five Love Languages as defined by Dr. Gary Chapman, whose research has broken into the mainstream in recent years.
The five love languages, (words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, acts of service, and receiving gifts) which describe how people express and prefer to receive love and understanding your partner’s needs have been shown to improve relationships.
