No one likes to admit they’ve “settled” in a relationship — and a new study shows that those who do are worse off.
Researchers at Florida State University asked 233 heterosexual newlywed couples to rate their own social status, level of marital bliss and tendency to seek the best possible outcomes — known as “maximizers.”
Men deemed maximizers by the survey were happiest with the most attractive brides; maximizing women, on the other hand, sought rich husbands.
“Maximizing people are constantly trying to obtain the very best outcomes in life,” reported lead author Juliana French.
Maximizers who settled for second-rate maintained a wandering eye throughout their newlywed years, according to the report, which appeared in this week’s Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin.
“In the context of romantic relationships, maximizers are those who seek the best possible partner and who, over the course of their relationships, continue to compare their partners to other potential partners,” said French.
NYC is full of these maximizers, said local matchmaker Bonnie Winston, adding that athletes, tech entrepreneurs and doctors all tend to chase arm candy.
One of her maximizer clients, a doctor, “loved that [his partner] wakes up at 6 a.m. every day and goes to SoulCycle. That’s the sort of thing that was important to him.”
These maximizers also tend to be her repeat customers.
“They have so many more relationships, lasting three or six months, maybe,” she said.
But maximizers can have an inflated sense of worth, added Winston, who was forced to drop such a client.
“I really felt like he was out of his league in terms of what he wanted in this universe. He didn’t have the looks or the charm.”