LOS ANGELES — Yes, those of us fortunate enough to be at Minute Maid Park Sunday night (into Monday morning) experienced something memorably crazy.
If Regis Philbin hadn’t already uttered the term “Bonkos!” in a 1994 episode of “Seinfeld,” it would have emerged now to describe Game 5 of the World Series at Minute Maid Park, a 13-12, 10-inning Astros victory that featured seven home runs, four blown leads and 14 pitchers and lasted a mind-blowing 5 hours and 17 minutes.
But we’ve now seen two of these marathon, homer-filled slugfests in five days, so it feels like the right time for a request:
Let’s make sure these types of ballgames remain the aberration, rather than a gateway drug to a longer and stronger prototype.
Call me a stick in the mud if you must. However, I’ll take a different type of walk-off thriller — remember the Yankees’ 2-1 loss to the Astros in Game 3 of the ALCS, also at Minute Maid? — seven days out of seven and 29 out of 30. I’d prefer something resembling that in Game 6 Tuesday night at Dodger Stadium and Game 7 Wednesday, if the Dodgers stave off elimination.
“These are just two really good teams, just throwing haymakers at each another, trying to outlast each other,” Astros manager A.J. Hinch said minutes after the game ended.
Maybe it’s that simple. The Astros field a phenomenal offense that seems to have gained strength from its Yankee Stadium power outage in the last round. The Dodgers possess an ultra-deep roster with plenty of long-ball options. In Game 2 at Dodger Stadium, the two clubs combined for eight homers — and five in extra innings, the first time that had ever occurred in any game — in a 7-6, 11-inning Astros victory that lasted 4:19.
To be fair, we’ve also witnessed a Game 1 with a modest 3-1 score (in the Dodgers’ favor) that lasted an enjoyable 2:28 as well as a 6-2 Dodgers victory in Game 4 that went 3:06. It’ll also be interesting to see how the ball travels at Dodger Stadium with what could be a 40-degree decrease Tuesday from the Game 1 first-pitch temperature of 103 degrees; it was 93 degrees in the homer-happy Game 2.
In the heavyweight bout that Hinch referenced, both of these clubs appear wiped out, their bullpens decimated, many starters and relievers fretting about the slickness of the baseballs. The hitters are feasting on the weakness like when Jesse grabbed the cash from the stolen ATM machine that killed Spooge on “Breaking Bad.”
This Series has served as a coming-out party for such as like the Astros’ Jose Altuve and Carlos Correa and the Dodgers’ Clay Bellinger. They’re the sort of players who can engage the younger and more diverse demographic that commissioner Rob Manfred strives to reach.
Now let’s make sure that those younger folks don’t get exhausted by too many video-game type baseball games. Maybe the specifications on the baseballs need to be altered to make them less bouncy. Maybe the teams’ analytic minds will come up with ways to counter the increased emphasis on launch angle. Something, anything to ensure that we don’t get another game like Game 5 for another 20 years or so.
“As emotional of a roller coaster as that game was, and we know we didn’t get the result we wanted, the bottom line is we still get to play a World Series game [Tuesday],” Dodgers third baseman Justin Turner said Monday. “So everyone is going to be excited about that.”
By all means. And since variety is the spice of life, the best way to follow the Game 5 sensory overload would be a tight, taut, pitchers’ duel. Can Verlander and the Dodgers’ Rich Hill deliver? Any chance a fresh batch of less slick baseballs can be delivered in time? The Post will even pick them up at the airport and deliver them to Chavez Ravine.