Though it seemed as if there were a decision to be made by Ryan Palmer, there really was no decision to be made at all.
Palmer was playing The Barclays this week at Plainfield Country Club in Edison, N.J., despite the sudden loss of his father, Charles “Butch’’ Palmer, who died at age 71 in an Aug. 18 car accident when he rolled his SUV and was ejected from the vehicle.
Whether to play at The Barclays wasn’t really Ryan Palmer’s decision anyway. It was his father’s.
“The last thing he would want me to do is not play,’’ Palmer said Saturday. “All I could do was come out and play for him.’’
Palmer has played on, and has played well enough that he’s in the heat of contention to win with Sunday’s final round looming.
Palmer began Saturday’s third round on the cusp of contention at 4-under, three shots off the 36-hole lead held by Bubba Watson.
Palmer followed that with a 65 on Saturday — at one point vaulting to the solo lead after a birdie on No. 13 — and enters the final round at 9-under, two shots behind leaders Jason Day and Sang-moon Bae.
Butch Palmer never saw any of his son’s three PGA Tour wins in person.
“He never got to see me win, except on TV, but he’s been there every step of the way all week,’’ Palmer said. “So hopefully we can try and talk about it [Sunday] if it happens. I can’t put into words what it would mean for sure.’’
If Palmer does not win, there is something else he can do to honor his father: sprinkle his ashes around Augusta National, his dad’s favorite place. Butch Palmer accompanied his son to all five Masters in which he has played and even played a round with him one February.
Butch Palmer never told this to Ryan, but he once quietly told his wife, Gloria, at one Masters: “When I’m long gone, take my ashes and spread ’em out here.’’
Ryan Palmer smiled at that story, saying: “We’re not going to say we’re going to do that just yet. That might get me in trouble. But to the powers that be over there in Georgia … no, we’re not going to do that.’’
Palmer then made a playful gesture shaking his hand in his pants pocket as if he were secretly dropping ashes from them.
Everyone handles death and grieving differently. For those who have lost someone close to them, it is often best to immediately carry on with their lives, retain normalcy in their routine. That allows them not to forget about the loved one they lost, but to not dwell all day on the loss.
Cliché as it might be, for athletes, the playing field is a sanctuary of sorts after a tragic loss.
So surely, playing tournament golf has to be a therapeutic respite for Palmer, whose only mode of survival in the game of golf is to concentrate on every shot.
It’s impossible to measure intangibles, but it sure seems that using this tournament as a therapeutic tool, making the tournament a tribute to his late father, has intensified Palmer’s concentration inside the ropes.
“It’s the moments when I’m by myself at the hotel that are hard,’’ Palmer said. “But when I get inside the ropes, I have been calm. I’ve tried to tell myself to make things as quiet as possible. I’ve been trying to walk a little slower and keep my thoughts nice and calm.’’
The person closest to Palmer, other than his wife, Jennifer (who was scheduled to fly to New Jersey late Saturday night), is his caddie and high school friend, James Edmonds. He has noticed something profoundly powerful taking place with Palmer.
“He’s definitely got a calmness around him,’’ Edmonds said. “It’s been really serene out there. He’s in his element. This is what he does. When he gets inside the ropes, I know he feels at peace, at home. It’s after the round, like from now until [Sunday] morning, that’s going to be the hard part.’’
Edmonds has been a rock for Palmer all week, having dinner with him and encouraging him to talk about his father, letting him vent during the idle times away from the golf course that are most difficult on him.
“It’s the elephant in the room,’’ he said. “I’m not going to ignore it. [Sunday] is going to be a unique day. But he’s got the right mind to do something special. I don’t know what to expect [Sunday], but I really expect some really neat things.’’