If you’d like to take a naked vacation anytime soon — or just watch other people do it — you’d better hurry up.
Your options may be dwindling. Somebody called the nudism police, and as happened in the Garden of Eden so long ago, people are covering up.
Here’s the rundown on where skin isn’t in.
Forget topless tanning on the French Riviera
For real? Scores of impossibly slim French women lounging sans bikini tops, comfortably chatting with friends and even kids, has been a part of the scenery and culture for decades. But according to French Elle magazine, bronzing without tan lines is so over.
A new generation of women are now worried about the negative effects of sun exposure, like wrinkles and skin cancer. Plus, semi-nude sunbathing is no longer so private, thanks to smartphones and social media. Some even say the pastime has been “pornified” — after all, who can forget the paparazzi shots of Duchess Kate lounging topless that scandalously ended up on the cover of the French tabloid Closer?
Nudie beaches in Hainan are also a no-go
Apparently there were too many middle-aged Chinese men letting it all hang out on the beaches of Hainan, a resort-heavy island in the South China Sea. Though nude sunbathing is illegal there, it’s been big among domestic tourists. Hainan provincial Party Secretary Luo Baoming has had enough of that, saying: “Normal people will not swim or sunbathe naked in a public place.”
Wearing your birthday suit instead of a bathing suit can get you detained by the police for five to 10 days, “depending on the seriousness of the offense,” according to Reuters. You have to wonder how they decide that.
No more taking off your clothes in public in Barcelona
Blame the naked Italian tourists. Last month three guys spent three hours totally in the buff, wandering around La Barceloneta (a beachfront area in Barcelona, Spain, that sees millions of visitors each year).
The locals were not happy and actually held protests to force officials to crack down on illegal cheap room rentals, which residents say lead to too much rowdy, drunken — and naked — tourism.
At Machu Picchu, streakers are not welcome
It’s a thing. Or at least it was. A spate of tourists running naked through the ancient Incan site in Cuzco, Peru, this year — including four Americans, two Canadians and two Australians — prompted Peru’s Ministry of Culture to denounce the practice as disrespectful.
The ministry also came up with some new rules for visitors: Besides keeping their clothes on (which was always a rule), all foreigners will need to hire an official guide and follow predetermined routes through the citadel, and there will be time limits at specific points to keep traffic flowing.
Nude hiking in the Swiss Alps is finished
Yes, you missed it. After (mostly German) tourists starting trekking wearing nothing but their hiking boots in Appenzell Inner Rhodes, Switzerland, the citizens voted to ban the practice, and now fines are imposed on violators.
A government official reportedly called the strangely popular activity “thoroughly irritating.”