Weird But True

WEIRD BUT TRUE

A retired engineer in Britain spent a cold night spinning his wheels when he decided to take a shortcut home from church, only to have his wheelchair get stuck in the mud.

Robert Calloway, 86, had forgotten his cellphone, so he couldn’t call for help. He spent the night trapped in a park until 9 a.m., when he heard a dog barking and caught the attention of the animal’s owner.

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French guys are arousing penis envy around Europe, claiming to lead the way in a survey that asked 10,000 men in 25 countries to measure their appendages at, ahem, full staff.

The pecking order across the pond saw the French leading the way at 6.09 inches – while the Greeks came up last at 1.2 inches shorter.

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Help wanted: Jolly, child-friendly, fully bearded and bellied Santa Clauses with no criminal record. Must speak fluent German and be willing to travel.

American Santas having a tough time finding work should think about heading to Germany, where demand for Father Christmases is strong, employment agencies say.

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There’s a new kind of billboard in Siberia: the four-legged kind.

A new project in the frigid Russian territory is paying dog owners to let their canines wear specially designed clothes with ads on them.

It was a no-brainer in these tough economic times, a spokesman for the Promo Dog project said.

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Chinese cops were amazed to find an armless man steering a car with his feet.

Zing Shen, 42, said he’d been driving that way since losing his arms below his elbows in an industrial accident years ago. He was pulled over in a routine vehicle check.

“He said he was actually even more careful now with driving than he had been before he lost his arms,” a cop said.