We’re spending a week at a friend’s summer house. Our toddler can’t swim, and my wife is terrified about the pool and wants to cancel. How can I reassure her?
You can’t. Nationally, drowning is the leading cause of death of children under 5. So it’s not unreasonable that your wife is worried. As a parent, your concerns should be twofold.
First, will your child seek out the pool when no one is watching? The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission states that 69 percent of the 2,200 children involved in pool accidents each year were not expected to be in or around the pool, and 77 percent were missing in just five minutes or less.
Second, will your child slip underwater unnoticed while you are present? Most incidents occur while children are being supervised by one or more parents.
Call your friend and express concern. Find out where the pool is located. A pool attached to the house and easily accessed by multiple doors is a bigger concern than one some distance from the house, if only because of the time it might take a child to wander into it.
While most pools have a “self-closing gate,” this isn’t a preventive measure for a clever toddler. A lock purchased from a nearby hardware store will do, as will a twig, bungee cord or rope.
The American Red Cross offers many tips. For example, keep toys out of the pool and surrounding area where kids might seek them out.
You’ll also need to assess the dangers of pool time when everyone is present and watching the kids splashing around.
In a poolside scenario, distraction is the danger – yours, not theirs – and you cannot look away for a moment. Also, announce to everyone that your kid cannot swim, and that if your toddler is submerged at any time, immediate rescue is needed. If you need to dash indoors for even a moment, directly and clearly assign a specific person to watch your kid until you return.
Consider purchasing a certified lifejacket for your child to wear poolside (inflatable armbands do not qualify).
Finally, if your impending visit causes such anxiety that it won’t be fun, beg off. It’s OK not to go. After all, what’s fun about a week of worry?