If you hate running, if you like doughnuts and if you love beer, you can still be a top finisher in tomorrow’s marathon – or at least you can try.
Just cheat.
You won’t be the first one to give in to the temptation of turning 26.2 grueling miles of running into 26 casual miles of riding and a .2 sprint to the finish. In 1988, for example, 19 runners were disqualified.
Perhaps the easiest way to do it is to hop on the subway at Fourth Avenue and 86th Street in Brooklyn as the race passes there at about the second mile.
There, you can pick up the R train and ride it to 57th Street and Seventh Avenue. That might still be trouble for the very lazy because you’ll still have to run into Central Park to the finish line.
That’s the same tactic allegedly used by one of the most notorious cheaters in New York Marathon history.
Martin Franklin was fresh as a daisy when he crossed the finish line 19th in the 2001 race. The problem is, he was only recorded at the start and finish, and was disqualified.
Franklin has now been ostracized by the elite running community.
If you try to pull a Franklin, you’ll be caught, too, because the marathon tracks runners at various points along the course with a computer chip shoe tag.