I WAS so charming, it was disarming.
And that’s how I tamed the Queen of Mean.
From the first moment our eyes met through a crowd of onlookers outside NBC’s “Today” show studios yesterday morning in Rockefeller Plaza, Anne Robinson was smitten.
“He’s a good-looking old fart!” she exclaimed with surprise, unable to conceal her delight.
It was the first time we’d come face-to-face since the tart-tongued host of NBC’s “Weakest Link” lashed out at me with a barrage of schoolyard epithets in an interview in The Post earlier this week.
Reacting to my negative review of her new quiz show before its premiere Monday, Robinson called me an “old fart” who deserved to be jailed. She then cruelly poked fun at my pitiful salary.
In yesterday’s Post, I responded to her childish name-calling by calmly imploring her to cease any further escalation of the war of words she was clearly responsible for starting, for no apparent reason.
My argument must have been convincing, because by yesterday morning, the panther had turned into a pussycat.
“You’re quite good-looking in here,” she said to me when we met, as she held a copy of yesterday’s Post and begged me to accept her autograph.
Playing to the news photographers and video-camera crews who had been alerted to the possibility that I would be appearing outside the “Today” show studios, Ms. Robinson tried to engage me in one of the exchanges of insults that have become her trademark on “Weakest Link.”
But I was having none of it.
“I think you’re rubbish as a television critic!” she joked, slyly trying to goad me into some verbal fisticuffs.
Instead of taking the bait, I pointed out how much fun it’s been to play along with her quiz show and get every one of its simple questions right.
“I’ve gotten every question right so far on that show,” I informed her. “That show is so ridiculously easy!”
Rather than respond with a sharply worded insult, she changed the subject, complimenting me on my reputation as a TV critic and even referring to me as a “celebrity journalist.”
Could this really be the TV personality who was voted the meanest woman in the U.K.?
Later, she listened attentively as I taught her a few things about American TV.
“America leads the world in television-program production, and everybody in England watches American shows,” I lectured her gently. “But nobody here watches British shows.”
She then asked me how I would explain the runaway success of her show, which started out as a huge hit in England.
“That’s an American show now,” I reminded her. “Congratulations!”
And to that, she replied, “You are the weakest link – goodbye, Adam!”
Ouch! Now that hurt!
——-
SHE SAID – HE SAID… Our critic goes head-to-head with TV’s dissing ‘Link’
Anne: He’s a good-looking old fart! Adam, where’s Adam?
Adam: Why don’t you hand out today’s Post, Anne?
NBC person: There’s a nice big item by Adam Buckman in there.
Anne: But that’s not why they’re buying it. Where’s your pen? I’ll give you an autograph.
Adam: I’ve got a pen right here.
Anne: You mean you’re a journalist who remembers to bring a pen?
Adam: Yes, I did. I’m taping everything, so watch what you say.
Anne: You’ve got a face for taping, haven’t you?
Adam: Take care of my friend here.
Anne: (Talking to young boy, Eric, she asks): Who’s the weakest link in your family? No weak links in your family? On the other hand, you’re standing next to Adam from The Post, who’s a pretty weak link. Have you seen the ratings this morning, Adam?
Adam: No, not yet. Were they any good? Is anybody watching?
Anne: A 21 share, so I think what I’ll say to you, Adam, is goodbye! What sort of television do you like, Adam?
Adam: I like quiz shows.
Anne: Do you?
Adam: Yes, I do.
Anne: But not my quiz show.
Adam: I don’t like you.
NBC person: Here’s today’s paper with Adam’s picture.
Anne: Right. You’re quite good-looking in here, Adam. Did they work on you?
Adam: Yes, they touched it up.
*
Anne: What is it you don’t like, television critic, about a show that got a 21 percent share?
Adam: I don’t have to like what everybody else likes.
Anne: Oh, I see. Don’t you feel, as a television critic, it might be handy if you’re in tune with the public?
Adam: No, I am in tune with the public. On this one . . .
Anne: Well, then, how come you don’t like a show that’s got a 21 share?
Adam: Because I don’t like the way you come here with your ill-mannered British quiz-show hosting ways and besmirch the reputations of our great television shows and our wonderful game-show traditions that we have here in broadcasting in America.
*
Anne: You are the weakest link – goodbye, Adam! And when he grows up, he’s going to be a journalist. Bye, bye, Adam!