“The Sopranos” ( )
Sunday at 9 on HBO
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WHILE Tony Soprano was “away,” as they say, for the past several months, there were some big changes in his family – both his real and his surreal ones.
For one thing, his mother, Livia – who could have given Caligula’s great gram a run for her money – died.
No, I’m not giving away any secrets, because, unless you too have been “away” in a maximum security prison and in solitary, you’d know that actress Nancy Marchand (Livia) died last summer.
What were they going to do? Give old lady Soprano amnesia so she could show up again next year with no memory and a different face?
No. They throw her a helluva nasty funeral instead.
Also, Tony’s daughter, Meadow, made it over the river and through the tunnel and is enrolled at Columbia University; A.J. has gone teen-moody; Carmela has no residual effects from her trip to Italy; Janice, who went back to Seattle and is still trying to find her inner child (isn’t one Janice enough?) comes back for the funeral; Michael and Adriana are still coke heads even though Michael’s ready to be “made” (Tony! The kid’s a bum – why can’t you see it?); Uncle Junior is still complaining; Paulie Walnuts’ hair has not moved; Silvio’s posture and rug are both still terrible; and some new crew members have shown up.
And, most importantly, Tony is about to have a breakthrough in his therapy with Dr. Melfi. He discovers – finally – why he faints when he sees cold cuts.
Something’s happened to me, too, by the way.
I’m in mourning for Richie Aprile and I can’t get past it. I didn’t know I loved him so, but I do – and more than Janice the bitch ever did, that’s for sure.
Who knew I could ever mourn a man in Sans-a-Belt slacks?
The show misses him, too. His character was too good to get killed off, and that’s what makes “The Sopranos” so great – no fear of change, no matter how devastating it might be.
But there is something this season that is a bit different. And it’s much more subtle than killing off Richie, or even Big Pussy. And, if Tony doesn’t do something to stop it – now – it could get worse.
I always thought the biggest difference between “The Sopranos” and every other cliched Italian mob show and movie – in fact, every single other show with Italians even in it – is that “The Sopranos” was always written at eye level. The writers never looked down on their characters. Nor were they contemptuous of them.
That’s because creator and writer David Chase, who is Italian himself, has the “ear.”
An “ear” is that rare thing among script writers that allows them to actually hear the way people speak in real life as opposed to the way characters “speak” on the written page.
Very rarely, for whatever reason, do writers ever have an “ear” when they put words in the mouths of Italian-Americans.
Well, I’m here to report that, no, we are not a bunch of cafones who are constantly in the process of either “cookin’ da basta and gravy” or eating it.
If we were, we’d have no time to be racist or commit the senseless acts of random violence that we’re always commiting when we’re not cooking da sauce.
This year, maybe because Chase wants to gradually wean himself from writing, his “ear” doesn’t seem as strong.
Too often in the first few episodes, great dialogue is replaced with the cheap shot. It’s of the “F… you, no f… you, no, f… you!” variety. (Wise guys very rarely, by the way, say this word in front of their mothers, aunts and daughters).
Then there are the endless “gapagoal” jokes. And finally there’s the racism thing.
For example, Meadow brings home an African-American kid from school, and Tony immediately pulls him aside and hits him with all kinds of racist slurs. The scene just doesn’t have the “ear.” Tony is not that stupid.
He might tell Meadow to stop bringing him around. He’d for sure complain to Carmela – but to insult the kid in his house? Nah.
Show some respect for your characters or you’ll be the ones getting knocked off.
What’s to love? Among other things, the casting – particularly Alla Kiouka as Svetlana, the one-legged, chain-smoking Russian blonde, who you may remember as Tony’s mistress’s best friend, (she’s old lady Soprano’s home health care aid now).
This year, Svetlana mixes it up good with Janice, and somebody’s gonna end up dead if they don’t stop. Svetlana, is such a good character that I may go into mourning all over again if they whack her.
I’m not giving anything else up. I may not like my knees, but they’re the only ones I’ve got. And…anyway, I’m no rat.