BEFORE the Lakers decide to release J.R. Rider in Dennis Rodman’s recognizance, let’s quickly recap his work week, shall we?
After showing up an hour late for Tuesday night’s Pacers game, which he didn’t get to sulk or skulk in until the third quarter, our hero was fined, cuffed and ordered to assume the position he, no doubt, exited the womb.
His conscience properly stirred, Rider gave a big shout out to Laker GM Mitch Kupchak later on that evening. Next day after practice, he spread some additional holiday cheer by menacing the media – which doesn’t necessarily make him a bad guy; I’ve been guilty of the same offense for years.
“If you’re all worried about your livelihood, your family, eating and living life, retract it or get it confirmed. If it’s not confirmed, I’m telling you right now, same way you throw darts at me, I will throw darts back,” Rider growled. “Take it how you want to take it . . . and you can call David Stern and tell him I threatened you.”
Upon hearing about the affront, Stern immediately deducted another No. 1 pick from the Timberwolves’ future, an overdue judgment for drafting Rider in the first place.
This just in: L.A.’s gang of correspondents have offered J.R. a compromise. They promised to check their sources as often as he checks his watch.
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WITH 24 shopping days before Christmas, what better time to evaluate the baskets of cheer Dave Checketts has brought to midtown Manhattan.
Under his astute leadership, the Knicks are pining for the glory days of Al Bianchi, while the Rockettes have a better chance to win the Cup than the Rangers.
But, to Checketts credit, the wheels are always turning. If our newspaper’s coverage is correct, Dikembe Malaria is on the horizon . . . as soon as he has his shots . . . or makes one.
A competent person running the Garden? Talk about your Miracle on 33rd Street!
Subject: Both the Knicks and the tree were lit up Wednesday for all to see.
If ever there were a team that was ripe for embalming it was the Heat. Losers of four straight coming into Larry Allegedly’s lair and fresh from its fourth-quarter home disintegration vs. the Bucks, Miami manhandled its gracious hosts for 24 minutes before anyone on the Knicks determined there was any sense of urgency.
So much for cremating a loathed conference rival whose stud is gone for the year and whose psyche may not have been far behind.
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CLEARLY, Pat Riley was caught in the act of groveling and groping when he acquired Cedric Ceballos (fits snugly into Alonzo Mourning’s $3.92M medical exception) from the Pistons, who picked up most ($3 million) of the tab, thus giving the Heat a free look for the remainder of the season.
But don’t get the idea Riley is desperate. It’s not as if he acquired Nick Anderson . . . owner of a three-year guarantee ($5.85M, $6.45M, 7.15M) and currently a defunct decoration on the Kings’ pew.
A stone starter his 11 years in the NBA, Anderson was subjected to the demeaning DNP-CD (did not play, coach’s decision) for the first time in his career last Saturday against the Sonics.
The striking play of Peja Stojakovic, Doug Christie and impressive first-rounder (No. 18) Hidayet Turkoglu, has expunged Anderson from Rick Adelman’s rotation at off guard and small forward; irrelevant status that doesn’t figure to change any time soon.
His DNP streak is now at three (after sitting out against the Rockets and Spurs) and probably won’t end until the Kings take a breather against an eastern conference team.
Overall, Anderson is handling his abrupt disappearance from the radar screen (he’s averaging 8.2 minutes, a drop from 29.1 last season) as well as can be expected. Naturally he’s terribly frustrated and would’ve appreciated some old-fashioned courtesy from his superiors. He feels someone on the coaching staff or management should’ve have had the decency to brief him before he was banished to “Curtis (Skid) Rowe.”
“I just thought as a veteran, I should get shown a little bit more respect,” Anderson told the Sacramento Bee’s Martin McNeal. “Come to me as a man. I’m a young man, and I’ve dealt with things worse than this in my life. Yeah, I’m disappointed in the way things were handled, but I guess that’s the way some people handle situations.
“I’ve never been one to create a problem, and I don’t want to start one here. I never have, never will. I’ll just be quiet, go on my merry way and just keep working hard.”
Subject: Don MacLean nailed five games for steroids.
Let’s see Riley get a medical exception for that.
ATHOUGH he’s one-for-one when mugging opponents, Charles Oakley has been squirming like a toad to stay above 30 percent from the field this season. Seems he pulled a hamstring during the preseason (no, not when he slapped Tyrone Hill prior to an exhibition for not forking over a 65G debt) and refuses to give it proper rest.
By halftime Saturday against the Knicks, Oak’s shot had 26 percent body fat. That’s when Niagara coach Jack Armstrong (now a Raptors commentator) offered him a tip: “If you can stand the pain, get more lift on your jumper.”
Oakley proceeded to hit a 3-pointer, a two, another trifecta and another deuce in the second half. And followed that up with a 7-for-10 display of accuracy in Sunday’s victory over Chicago. As a way of saying thanks, Oak gave Armstrong 20 percent off on his next hot wax.
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THERE’S no question Tracy McGrady got fouled by John Stockton to end Wednesday night’s loss and should have gone to the line with a chance to tie the Jazz. Still, things are looking up for the Magic. Doc Rivers took his team bowling yesterday and Grant Hill was medically cleared to keep score.
Subject: Joe Smith, savior.
After watching him notch 20 points (8-11 FG) in his Pistons’ debut against the Grizzlies, I’ve reconsidered. Maybe Timberwolves owner Glen Taylor didn’t turn himself into the league to get out of paying Smith $85M, after all.
Karl Malone can’t possibly complain about being docked a game for slapping Christian Laettner. If the league nailed him every time he hit an opponent with a dirty blow he’d have to apply to Micheal Richardson for reinstatement. Though Stern says he’ll gladly rescind the fine if Malone agrees to make his next target Mark Cuban.