September 22, 2000

WHY AL GORE'S PLAN FOR STRATEGIC OIL RESERVES STINKS

LET'S review some basic facts about crude oil. You already know, for instance, that it comes in a barrel and the recent price of $37 has Americans over one. And...

AT&T GOES BEGGING - WANTS FTC TO HELP IT UNLOAD TWE STAKE

If first you don't succeed, try, try again. AT&T execs went back to Washington, D.C., this week in their continuing effort to squeak out of a cumbersome joint venture with...

KOZMO FAILS TO DELIVER A DEAL

The union of Kozmo and Urbanfetch is off. The one-hour delivery services had been in talks for several weeks, with Kozmo possibly buying up its smaller competitor. But sources close...

INTEL FRIED FOR CUT IN REVENUE OUTLOOK

Intel chief Andy Grove will have to do some quick fence-mending after dropping his bomb on Wall Street. Just minutes before markets closed yesterday, Intel said revenue is weaker in...

DOW JONES STUNNED BY DEFECTION OF HOT CFO

Dow Jones lost its prized CFO yesterday, casting a pall over the company that has seen a return to favor on Wall Street during his tenure. Jerry Bailey, 48, annouced...

THIS TIME, L.A. TIMES RAIDS NEWSDAY

Los Angeles Times Editor John Carroll has looked East once again, raiding Newsday for Assistant Managing Editor Miriam Pawel, who will be the new metro editor of the Left Coast...

A CASH INFUSION TURNS PORTUGUESE GRAPES WORLDLY

IN a New Wine Order dominated by multinational grapes - think Cabernet Sauvignon as Time Warner and Chardonnay as Disney - Portuguese wines can seem like quirky, almost subversive individualists....

ON THE HARD STUFF - MARK KNOPFLER DOESN'T WANT TO SPEND HIS LIFE HAVING LUNCH

IN music, one-time Dire Straits mastermind Mark Knopfler, 51, seems to have done it all. As a guitarist, he's an original who developed his own electric finger-picked style. His songwriting...

CUT! DUMP 'URBAN LEGENDS' INTO THE SEWERS

DID you hear the one about the masked killer stalking the cast and crew of a slasher movie? Sure you have - in "Freddie's New Nightmare," "Scream 3" and now,...

DRECK DRESSED AS ART - DESPITE 2 GOOD PERFORMANCES, 'DANCER' IS JUST FAKERY WITH AN ANTI-AMERICAN DRUM TO BEAT

DANCER IN THE DARK Lars von Trier's controversial musical tragedy is manipulative schlock decked out in the trappings of art. Running time: 139 minutes. Rated R. Lincoln Plaza, Union Square,...

PRODUCERS FLOCK TO LONDON ... TO MINE FOR BRITISH GOLD

THOUGH the fall theater season is technically under way, it's still a bit sleepy on Broadway. And so producers are hopping planes to swinging London to check out the latest...

'PEOPLE' WHO NEED STREISAND HAD BETTER ACT NOW

IT'S the beginning of the end for Barbra Streisand. The biggest selling female recording artist of all time said so long to fans, as she performed the first of four...

HAUNTED BY THEIR TV SET

THE FBI is investigating a suburban Detroit couple who claim to be receiving death threats and racially charged hate messages through their television. The threats, directed at retired autoworkers Charlotte...

B'KLYN MUSEUM'S 'HIP-HOP NATION' A FASHION SENSATION

'HIP-HOP Nation: Roots, Rhymes, and Rage," a Brooklyn Museum of Art exhibit of more than 400 items chronicling rap's history from the '70s to now, is long on fashion but...

SNEAKING 'SUSPICION': THE THRILL IS GONE

'UNDER Suspicion" is a profound disappointment, given its cast and source material. A stilted, tensionless update of Claude Miller's fine if stagy French thriller, "Garde a Vue" - for some...

'THE FANTASTICKS' DOESN'T TRAVEL WELL

IT'S not hard to see why this film version of the long-running (40 years and counting) off-Broadway classic has been gathering dust on MGM's shelf for nearly five years. "The...

NOW SHE'S COOKIN'

BESIDES establishing the beautiful Spanish actress Penelope Cruz as a star, "Woman on Top" should do no small service to the Brazilian tourist industry. For while most of the action...

STILL GOLDEN - WHO SAYS OLYMPICS ARE BORING?

AM I the only guy left on the planet who enjoys watching the Olympics? People are just so disgruntled with the Summer Games. They're complaining about the analysts, the up-close-and-personal...

JFK AIRPORT BIDS AU REVOIR TO CONCORDE

An Air France Concorde that had been stranded at Kennedy Airport since July flew back to Paris yesterday in what could be the supersonic jet's final flight. The delta-winged jet...

IRAN SLASHES JEWISH 'SPY' JAIL TERMS

An Iranian appeals court yesterday reduced the jail terms of all 10 Jews convicted of spying for Israel in a case that drew international condemnation. The three-judge panel set aside...

BUSH PLAN WINS THUMBS-UP FROM 'SURVIVOR' SIT-IN

CLEVELAND - George W. Bush returned yesterday to the daytime talk-show circuit, billing himself as a political survivor - and promptly won a hearty thumbs-up from a TV-version "Survivor." "Live...

JUST-FREED CON STABS WOMAN, 30

A South African woman who moved to the Big Apple last month after falling in love with the city was stabbed by a newly sprung ex-con as she returned home...

PICTURE THIS: 'WALK' SIGNS TO GIVE WAY TO SYMBOLS

Pretty soon, pedestrians in the Big Apple won't have to read English to know when to cross the street. The old "Walk-Don't Walk" signs that have guided - or been...

BUSH SLAMS GORE'S IDEA TO PUMP U.S. OIL RESERVES

Al Gore yesterday said it's time to tap into the Strategic Petroleum Reserve to cut high prices at the pump - but GOP rival George W. Bush torched the idea,...

CAMPAIGN SNAPSHOT

GEORGE W. BUSH: (MD+BO)Catch phrase of the day: (MD-BO) "I trust people to make the right decisions for their families . . . and I trust people to make the...

ADWATCH

CANDIDATE: Rick Lazio TITLES: "Taxes" and "Scores" LENGTHS: 15 seconds each AIRING: Statewide PRODUCED BY: Mike Murphy SCRIPTS: Ad No. 1: Announcer: "What's Hillary Clinton's record on taxes? Expensive. Hillary...

THE GOOD, THE BLASS & THE UGLY - NEW DESIGNER FLUBS HIS FIRST BLASS COLLECTION AND JILL STUART JUST PLAIN MISSES THE MARK

When a fashion show is really good, you can feel the excitement in the air before the applause even begins. It's kind of thrilling. There's a kind of anticipation at...

DESIGNERS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN

CYNTHIA Rowley and Nanette Lepore brought the fun back into fashion with their girly-girl collections. Rowley showed sexy bird print wrap dresses, and '50s-style honeycomb print dresses. Her black string...

HALSTON'S STUNNING, VICTOR VICTORIOUS

Craig Natiello's spring Halston collection boasted many Oscar-ready frocks, including a blush and gold lace halter dress and a black scarf grown. Though he used a lot of leopard print...

IRAN 'SPY' TERMS CUT

An Iranian appeals court yesterday reduced the jail terms of all 10 Jews convicted of spying for Israel in a case that drew international condemnation. The three-judge panel set aside...

HUNT IS ON FOR BRITISH SPY-HQ BOMBERS

Police scoured central London yesterday for traces of IRA renegades who may be responsible for a daring missile attack on the headquarters of Britain's MI6 intelligence service, authorities said. Investigators...

OLYMPIC SPRINT RIVALS ARE ALSO FAST FRIENDS

SYDNEY - Maurice Greene and Ato Boldon, the two fastest men on earth, will meet up at the north end of Stadium Australia tomorrow for one of the Summer Olympics'...

THIS MAN PUTS THE 'ILL' IN SILLY SEASON

I HAVE always felt sorry for anyone named Billy whose Little Willie makes him look silly. Kathleen Willey (pronounced Willie) has sued Billy over invasion of privacy. Now Willey has...

RICK COULD GET BUSH-WHACKED

RICK LAZIO could be in very big trouble if an internal poll taken by Mayor Giuliani is to be believed. Shortly before Giuliani dropped out of the race in May,...

FORBES 400: MARTHA'S ROLLING IN DOUGH

It's a good thing to be loaded - just ask Martha Stewart, who's made her debut on Forbes' list of the 400 richest people in America. Or ask wrestling czar...

LAW INTERN HELD IN $2M PLOT TO SELL TOBACCO-SUIT SECRETS

A scheming summer intern at a Manhattan law firm that is suing Big Tobacco for more than $1 billion has been charged with swiping his bosses' trial strategy and trying...

WILLEY SUES PREZ FOR 'SMEAR' TACTIC

WASHINGTON - The ex-White House volunteer who accused President Clinton of fondling her near the Oval Office sued the Clintons and several White House aides yesterday for allegedly smearing her...

AXING TEACHERS WHEN THERE'S A SHORTAGE JUST DOESN'T ADD UP

CITY high schools have shown the exit door to some 300 to 400 teachers in the first two weeks of the new year - in the middle of what officials...

CUBAN FLIERS CLEARED FOR PERMANENT U.S. LANDING

The U.S. government officially rolled out the red, white and blue carpet yesterday for the nine Cuban freedom fliers who survived a plane wreck at sea - clearing the way...

'OTHER WOMAN' IN GOTTI SPLIT SAYS SHE FEARS FOR HER LIFE

The Long Island woman linked by mob investigators to the breakup of Victoria Gotti's marriage has told cops she's living in fear, The Post has learned. Debra DeCarlo, 35, filed...

BOYS WENT WILDING, BUT SCHOOL DID ZILCH: PROBE

The principal of a Brooklyn middle school permitted a wolf pack of boys to sexually maul eight female students - and then failed to tell police about the crimes, Schools...

POLICE CHARGING MAN WITH BOTTLED H2-NO-NO

A 31-year-old Washington Heights man was charged yesterday with falsely telling cops he drank chemically contaminated bottled water. Eduardo Pardo became the first person arrested in the city's water-tampering scare....

DEMS GET A DOSE OF THEIR OWN MEDICINE

WASHINGTON - Republicans yesterday struck back at Al Gore and his connections to the drug industry, a day after it was reported that George W. Bush's health-care adviser has large...

$20,000 FROM PARK DONOR CAN'T BUY MUSEUM PEACE

An anonymous donor averted a showdown yesterday over a controversial Parks Department practice of demanding big-money "contributions" for event permits - by coughing up $20,000. But the donation - from...

SYMBOL-IC CHANGE FOR CITY'S 'WALK' SIGNALS

Pretty soon, pedestrians in the Big Apple won't have to read English to know when to cross the street. The old "Walk-Don't Walk" signs that have guided - or been...

U.S. FEARS CRACKDOWN IF SLOBBO LOSES ELECTION

The United States and NATO allies are bracing for new tensions in the former Yugoslavia amid evidence that Serbian strongman Slobodan Milosevic - desperate to stay in power - may...

DR. LAURA TV SHOW GETTING A 'WEAK' OFF

Dr. Laura Schlessinger's low-rated TV talk show is shutting down for a makeover. Officials at Paramount have stopped production for about a week to "retool" the daytime show, sources said....

FOES TO BREAK BREAD AT SMITH DINNER

Al Gore and George W. Bush, who differ on partial-birth abortions, will address the Al Smith dinner, the traditional showcase for presidential candidates. The Democratic and Republican presidential nominees have...

UPPER EAST SIDERS DEMAND 'BRAINY' HIGH SCHOOL

Upper East Side parents charge that public high schools in their neighborhoods are the pits - and they want the Board of Education to build a new "rigorous" college-prep high...

WHEELCHAIR MAN GOES GUNNING FOR BOSS OVER $$: COPS

A Brooklyn lawyer was shot yesterday by his former paralegal - a disabled 72-year-old who motored into the office in his wheelchair, pulled a gun and demanded payment of money...

ARAFAT: I'LL BE FLEXIBLE ON PEACE PACT

Yasser Arafat told a prominent U.S. Jewish leader he is willing to make a key land swap with Israel in a Mideast peace accord. Arafat is committed to reaching an...

SHE MOVES HERE - AND IS STABBED

A South African woman who moved to the Big Apple last month after falling in love with the city was stabbed by a newly sprung ex-con as she returned home...

RUDY WON'T GET RELIEF HELP ON W. SIDE STADIUM PLAN

None of the city's top mayoral contenders is voicing support for a West Side stadium - putting the squeeze on Mayor Giuliani to broker the ambitious deal before he leaves...

ICAHN SEEKS CHARTER STARTER

Financier Carl Icahn wants to start a charter school in the Big Apple. The mega-financier proposed to open the Icahn School in the South Bronx for 108 students in grades...

RITUAL FIRE TURNS FATAL

A Brooklyn woman who told cops she lit a candle on her bed to scare away evil spirits was charged yesterday in an arson fire that killed a neighbor. Maglie...

DEMS' SOFT-$$ ADS LASH LAZIO AS TALKS COLLAPSE

State Democrats released two soft-money ads attacking GOP Senate candidate Rick Lazio yesterday as talks between his aides and Hillary Clinton's camp broke down without a deal banning unregulated campaign...

B'KLYN HERO COPS REEL IN DWI SUSPECT

A Brooklyn woman owes her life to three hero cops who jumped into New York Harbor late last night and pulled her out of her sinking sports utility vehicle. Police...

NEAGLE'S AGENT, CASHMAN TALK TODAY

YANKEE NOTES TORONTO - When Barry Meister sits down with Brian Cashman today at Yankee Stadium, Denny Neagle's agent will be meeting with a man who puts more stock in...

THE POST MAN? - CONE: I CAN HELP YANKS IN PLAYOFFS

TORONTO - What, you thought David Cone would quit for the first time in his life simply because he has suffered through a nightmarish season that grew worse Wednesday night?...

THE BLAME GAME - ONCE AGAIN, BOBBY V PLACES PREMIUM ON SELF

PHILADELPHIA - Massive lineup shakeups serve the manager's ego more than his team in the midst of a slump, Bobby Valentine says. Overturning the post-game food table, the Met manager...

VALENTINE GIVES METS' BIG BATS A REST

MET NOTES PHILADELPHIA - Manager Bobby Valentine sat Mike Piazza, Robin Ventura and Derek Bell - three of the Mets' top five RBI men - in last night's 6-5 loss...

WHITE WASHED! - RICK WASTES AMAZIN'S NINTH-INNING COMEBACK

Phillies 6 - Mets 5 PHILADELPHIA - Turns out it could be the last-place Phillies that cost the Mets a shot at the NL East pennant, not the Atlanta Braves....

A PERSONNEL DAY -VALENTINE GIVES METS' BIG BATS THE DAY OFF

PHILADELPHIA - When the Mets took the field at the Vet for last night's must-win game against the Phillies, Mike Piazza, Robin Ventura and Derek Bell were all missing from...

U.S. SOFTBALLERS KEEPIN' THE FAITH

SYDNEY - U.S. softball team players have found themselves in territory most foul. If they were to lose to New Zealand or Italy in their next two games of the...

THE BUCS STOP HERE - LOOK FOR JETS TO KEEP TAMPA AT BAY

SINCE Keyshawn Johnson was traded to Tampa Bay, Jets players have heard that they are nothing without him. They've heard their coach bashed and their now top receiver skewered. And...

ALL SYSTEMS ARE GO FOR 'PEGASUS' RETURN

Fusaichi Pegasus, with five easy victories including the Kentucky Derby and Wood Memorial from six starts this year, is the reigning Big Kahuna of the nation's 3-year-olds, even though he...

FULL MOON BRIGHTENS THINGS UP

LAST week's full moon finally got the fall run of saltwater species underway around Long Island and along the New Jersey shore. Striped bass finally went on the feed after...

CHREBET CONTENT TO REMAIN LOW-KEY

By early afternoon yesterday, Keyshawn Johnson had completed the third of his series of ballyhooed pre-Jets-Bucs press conferences that were piped into television sets all over the country. As usual,...

REELING CURTIS: PRESSURE'S ON

H.S. PREVIEW Talk about pressure. "If we don't come away with a win this week, we'll be in last place in the city," said ever-worri- some Curtis head coach Fred...

BARROW: I'VE GOT TO GET BETTER

As he walked into the visitors locker room in Philadelphia two weeks ago, Ernie Accorsi spotted the familiar signs of victory. Joy everywhere. The first player at the first locker...

FASSEL: THIS ONE'S BIG

GIANT NOTES Rarely will a coach identify one game as holding considerably more significance than another, but Jim Fassel this week is laying it on the line. As he explained...

SPIKE CAN'T DO RIGHT THING

SPIKE LEE remains one of our favorite one-way-streeters. Yesterday, with Mike Francesa and Chris Russo on WFAN, Lee testified to how terribly hurt his friend Patrick Ewing was following the...

DREAM TEAM NEARLY HAS A NIGHTMARE

MEN'S HOOPSU.S. 85 - Lithuania 76SYDNEY - The Dream nearly died. Playing disinterested and disorganized, the U.S. men's basketball team was nearly monumentally dissed. In what would have been the...

WILLIAMS HUNGRY TO PASS BUCS

JET NOTES He became a star last Sunday when he returned a kickoff 97 yards for a touchdown that turned the game significantly in the Jets' favor against Buffalo, and...

WEIS STILL HOPING TO BE A KNICK

SYDNEY - It was a Marcus Camby play. A lean 7-foot-2 player raced the length of the court to swat what should have been an easy layup. And there you...

LUC: I'M NO EWING

SYDNEY - He made an 18-foot jumper. He made a baby hook. He dunked. The newest Knick center looked Ewing-esque. Though ending thoughts of the comparison was Luc Longley's main...

ALLAN WOULD MOVE TO POINT TO STAY IN N.Y.

SYDNEY - Allan Houston does not want to follow Patrick Ewing out of New York and is willing to add point guard minutes to make a lineup with Latrell Sprewell...

FOR RAFER, GAMES HAVE CHANGED

SYDNEY - These are not Jennifer Jordan-Johnson's father's Olympics. Rafer Johnson was an Olympian as the Greeks imagined. Regal. Sculpted. And good with a discus. He won the silver medal...

EWING-LESS KNICKS AIN'T DONE DEALING - FALK-CLIENT MUTOMBO LOGICAL SUCCESSOR TO PAT

What's next, Dave? Not Dave Checketts but superagent David Falk. Now it's time for Falk to cook up some more magic. Falk made Patrick Ewing disappear from New York Wednesday....

BRAWLER BENNETT ON THE RIGHT ROAD

SYDNEY-You better read this one today, because in a couple of days, odds are you will never hear the name Michael Bennett again. Then again, you might hear of him...

ASTREOS WINS LITTLE BROWN JUG

DELAWARE, Oh. - Astreos, driven by Chris Christoforou, Jr., captured the $547,972 Little Brown Jug at the Delaware County Fairgrounds yesterday afternoon by one length in 1:55.3. For the second...

ALONZO RUSHES TO HIS GOOD BUDDY'S RESCUE

SYDNEY - Alonzo Mourning ripped into Knick management and New York fans for showing what he thought was too little appreciation for his friend, Patrick Ewing. Mourning delivered the most...

EWING'S TRADE MARKS SAD DAY FOR VAN GUNDY

Jeff Van Gundy's suntanned face belied the misery he felt yesterday on Day 1 of the post-Patrick Ewing era. Van Gundy visited Ewing at his Potomac, Md. home last week...

SUPERFAN LEE BLAMES MEDIA

Enraged Knick superfan Spike Lee, who attended yesterday's Garden news conference, called the Patrick Ewing blockbuster that netted Glen Rice and Luc Longley "a terrible trade" and blamed the media...

WEBBER IS ANSWER TO PROBLEM

THE most poignant comment about Patrick Ewing yesterday did not come from Dave Checketts, Jeff Van Gundy or Scott Layden. It came from legendary Garden photographer George Kalinsky, who was...

DAVE TO PAT: NO HARD FEELINGS

Although Patrick Ewing strong-armed the Knicks into trading him Wednesday, Garden prez Dave Checketts said the organization holds no hard feelings, said no other Knick will ever wear "33" and...

PENN ST. WOES SHOCK PATERNO

STATE COLLEGE, Pa. - The worst part is no one can figure it out. Not the coach with 318 wins, who spent Saturday night and Sunday reflecting on his team,...

NO RAY OF HOPE FOR U.S. IN WOMEN'S GYMNASTICS

SYDNEY - Elise Ray, the brightest star in the U.S. gymnastics galaxy heading into the Summer Olympics, crashed to earth last night with a tremendous thud. She never really seemed...

ALMUTAWAKEL CALLS IT QUITS

Almutawakel, winner of the 1999 Dubai World Cup, has been retired from racing. He will stand at stud in Ireland at Derrinstown Stud. He will stand for 6,000 Irish Guineas....

RICE RARIN' TO JOIN SPREE AND HOUSTON

To Jeff Van Gundy, three elements determine whether your team wins or becomes the Clippers in the NBA: "You have to rebound, you have to defend inside and you have...

CHOW HINTS THIS MAY BE HER LAST GAMES

SYDNEY - Amy Chow's performance last night at the Summer Olympics individual all-around competition in women's gymnastics might be the last time Americans get to see the classy, soft-spoken Stanford...

'I CAN HELP IN PLAYOFFS,' CONE SAYS

YANKEE NOTES TORONTO - What, you thought David Cone would quit for the first time in his life simply because he has suffered through a nightmarish season? Cone is 37...

U.S. SOFTBALLERS BACK ON TRACK

SYDNEY - The U.S. Olympic softball team's offense finally came alive last night, keeping alive the team's hopes for another gold medal. Jennifer Brundage, who leads the team in hitting...

MJ'S READY TO BECOME 400-METER REPEATER

SYDNEY - With gold in his shoes and on his mind, Michael Johnson began his pursuit of repeating as 400-meter champion by easily advancing through the first round as the...

WELLS: YANKS VERY BEATABLE

TORONTO - Thirty minutes after turning the Yankees' bats to dust with a complete-game victory in which he bested Orlando "El Duque" Hernandez, David Wells lowered the boom on his...