Wynonna Earp recap: Season 4, episode 5: 'Holy War Part One'

The last we saw of Nicole, she was inhaling hair and bones from a jar Mam unleashed on her. But it seems that things are totally fine — she’s getting married to Waverly! Wynonna is walking her down the aisle. It’s beautiful but in a gothic way. The guests and attendants are all wearing black and mourning with heads down. Everyone’s there — Jeremy, Nedley, Doc — but not Waverly. When Nicole asks Wynonna where she is, she learns she isn’t coming because she knows what she did. Suddenly everyone is coughing, and Nicole wakes up to actual coughing. This was just a dream, but the smoke in the homestead is very real. She can’t wake Waverly, so she picks her up and carries her out.

Wynonna and Doc are flirting in the barn (does Wynonna literally sleep with her boots on??) when they smell the smoke as well. Seriously, though, when do these two get their staircase moment!? They rush to the homestead to find Rachel busting out of the door with a fire extinguisher. She put the fire out, but it still takes a minute for Waverly to wake up, gasping for breath. It’s a close call and everyone is convinced it’s the Clantons. Doc says there aren’t any unknown prints on the property, so they must be supernatural somehow. Time to investigate!

Doc and Wynonna head to the Glory Hole, where she finally meets the owner, Amin, and we finally learn his name! He knows all about the Clantons, and he says they’re something not-quite-demon, not-quite-human. He knows a lot about the supernatural goings-on, which is why he knows where Peacemaker is. He says it’s in a place where cherished but forgotten items end up. In order to get there, all she has to do is find a particular painting and then the people who run that place will find her. Sounds easy enough, so Wynonna and Doc head to the Ghost River Triangle museum.

Wynonna is as shocked as you are that the GRT has a museum! They find a video of Wyatt Earp talking about his time with the one and only Doc Holliday and their shootout at the O.K. Corral. Doc is struck by something Wyatt says — that Doc fired first — but he doesn’t dwell on it. They’ve got a painting to find, which they do and literally just walk out with it. If only they thought of that in Ocean’s Twelve!

As they stand outside the museum, a loud bell chimes. While Doc covers his ears, Wynonna — and the painting — disappear. Wynonna reappears in a house with a nun. Clearly used to the weird and absurd, Wynonna doesn’t even seem to blink at this. The nun throws holy water at the painting and a new one emerges, one showing a “scorned woman.” This is the Sanctuary of the Scorned Woman and the nun says they need help finding this one. She leads Wynonna to the room full of weapons, but Peacemaker won’t come to her. So, she leaves, painting in hand.

Meanwhile, Jeremy is evicting Cleo and Sheriff Holt from the BBD office and setting up shop on his own. Waverly and Nicole try to help him, but one half of WayHaught suddenly has a case of the frogs. Nicole remembers what she did to get Wave and company out of the Garden and every time she tries to say it, she throws up frogs — yes, literally.

That’s when we get a flashback to Nicole during The Dark Days: She’s talking to Margot Clanton about how she can’t wait any longer for Waverly to come back. Margot whispers something in her ear about the price she’ll have to pay, something we don’t hear, which Nicole remembers in present-day and says, “No, I couldn’t have promised that.” But, clearly, she did because another frog comes up.

With the Clantons bumped from their office, they’re grumbling at home, but Margot says it’s time to celebrate: She’s been obsessing her whole life about what happened to her family at the O.K. Corral. Apparently, she’s the so-called ‘heir’ in her family, and she was worried about which child would take her place. But now she doesn’t have to worry about it, she’s set the wheels in motion to end the Earps and Doc Holliday — which will end their version of the curse.

Over at Shorty’s, Nicole is trying to keep the frogs down by drinking tequila, but it doesn’t seem to work. Anytime she tries to say what she’s done, she throws up another frog. If they try to guess, she throws up frogs. She even tries to write it down, but all that she can scribble are cartoon tadpoles. They go to the homestead, where Jeremy finds three possible cures: a spell that will turn her into a demon dog, a drowning with salted holy water, or an antidote that could turn her intestines to snakes. She opts for option 3.

While Nicole waits on the concoction, she and Wynonna have a heart to heart. Nicole feels like she failed Waverly, but Wynonna says she did what she had to do to get them home. Wynonna feels like Peacemaker doesn’t want her, like she’s failed as the Earp heir. Her only hope is finding the scorned woman in the painting. Nicole helps her out by identifying the backdrop: Steve Gulch.

Nicole then gets up, goes into the kitchen, and promptly dumps the antidote Jeremy and Waverly have been carefully crafting. Next, she grabs a knife and a cleaver from the kitchen drawer and heads to the barn to attack Wynonna. She gets in a swipe, but when Wynonna punches her, Nicole comes out of it. They realize she must be under some dark magic, and that’s when they find her clothes from the night before in the barn. They smell like gasoline and have a lighter in the pocket. She set the fire, not the Clantons.

But Wynonna still believes this is the work of the Clantons. She’s riled up and ready to go attack them when Waverly convinces her she can’t go without Peacemaker. So, Wynonna and Doc set off for Steve Gulch. They get there and find the scorned woman is none other than Rosita. Remember her? The Revenant who tried to sell Wynonna and Doc’s baby? Yeah, that Rosita. Things are getting interesting…

While all this is going on, Rachel is lying about being at the rec center. She’s really at the Clanton junkyard trying to figure out what’s happened to Billy. She calls his cell phones and finds it ringing in the barn. Billy, as a reaper now, appears behind her but she doesn’t see him. You in danger, girl!

This episode leaves everyone in a sticky situation: While trying to tie up her girlfriend (for safety reasons, not sexy ones), Waverly ends up getting handcuffed to the bed while Jeremy and Nicole race to Shorty’s to get Nedley’s help. Waverly breaks free and enters the bar just as Jeremy drowns Nicole in a tub and Nedley, while wearing a bear’s head, recites from an ancient book.

What a weird, wonderful show. See you all back here next week, when hopefully we see that Nicole is fine and no longer drowned or vomiting frogs.

Best Earp-ism:

“Why do you smell like burnt marshmallow cologne? Is it unisex?” — Jeremy

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