'The L Word' recap: Look how serious we are

Yowsa, that was boring, wasn’t it? For an episode titled “Let’s Get This Party Started,” this week’s installment of The L Word acted more like a wallflower at the TV-watching orgy that takes place at my apartment every Sunday night. It was a somber, mousy little thing, standing in place and not offering much in the way of stimulating conversation. And after all my bitching and moaning about how this show has turned into a situation comedy, it veered back toward the serious this week. Vexing, ladies!

I’ll start with what I liked: that ending. We’ve been building toward a Bette and Tina reunion, so… is this it? It’s become increasingly clear this season that Bette and Jodi are sliding along at a really fragile impasse; neither of them is bending enough to make the relationship work as it should. (The problems: Bette’s self-absorption, the chip on Jodi’s shoulder, Tina’s general hotness.) Bette and Tina have been great adversaries for the past few seasons, but they’re also the heart and soul of the show, the couple you’re always rooting for even when they’re acting their worst. When Bette collapsed into tears, I literally said aloud, “Uh oh!” It was a surprising and somber moment, but I’m not certain what it portends. Tell me, Popwatchers: Are we headed for a full-on reunion, a secret affair, a one-night stand, or nothing at all?

The military investigation of Tasha (Rose Rollins, pictured, left) took some interesting turns this week, even if they felt more plot- than character-driven. I suppose it’s a good thing that Alice (Leisha Hailey, right) is such a high-strung freak (“Is it me? Is it because I’m too loud and out?”) when she’s pinned into a corner — it’s her passion that’s forcing Tasha to take a harsher line with her lawyer (and, in the process, inject some dramatic heft into this storyline). Still, I don’t entirely buy that her lawyer’s wife would suddenly change the dude’s mind about helping Tasha out — he seemed pretty dead-set against it last week. Of course, the most thought-provoking thing in this entire episode occurred as I watched Alice frantically erase the names off of her famous chart. It dawned on me as I watched this: The centerpiece of Alice’s living room is a huge hookup chart featuring all of her friends and everybody she’s ever slept with. Oh my tacky.

addCredit(“The L Word: Paul Michaud”)

We met some newcomers to the L World this week: Dawn andCindy arrived from Miami. Yes, Dawn and Cindy. With names like that,they should be arriving from an ABC Afterschool Special about thedangers of PCP, but I digress. These ladies are hot hot hottttt— and therefore the women who finally got Shane to break her agonizingtwo-week celibacy break. Not sure what that whole ‘downlow party’ wasall about (this is why I don’t live in L.A.), and I thought I spiedGretchen Mol as one of those go-go dancers for a sec, but Dawn andCindy are the ladies who’ll eventually bring us the Turkish oilwrestling scenes that have been all over the promos for this season.And since I literally cannot wait to see how The L Word handles that storyline— I’m sure it will be super-duper subtle, just like everything else onthe show! — I’m happy to welcome these two. Plus, they looked goodhaving sex with Shane.

And what about Crazy Jenny? Not much movement there this week…she’s being her typical nutjob self. Did you notice how spiffed upAdele has already become? I’m telling you, she’ll be Eve Harrington anyminute. Les Girls is going to be one utterly crappy disaster,at least with this creative team at its helm. Heck, sometimes I wonderhow Jenny even manages to pull on her knickers in the morning. Sheseems like the kind of person who keeps a chamberpot at the edge of herbed and takes tinctures when she’s sick because it’s “vintage” and”like, so morbid,” so it’s hard to imagine her actually puttingtogether a production that doesn’t resemble lowbrow lesbian porn. Orsomething stupidly experimental, like ten minutes of bleeps and blurpsand a close-up of her eyeball. Me, I’m just hoping it reaches the sameapex of ridiculousness that was last seen in her circus dreams.