Jimmy Kimmel Takes Pointed Shots at Tom Cruise’s Scientology, Will Smith’s Slap In Oscars Opening Monologue

By Meghan O'Keefe @megsokay
Published March 12, 2023, 8:30 p.m. ET

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Host Jimmy Kimmel kicked off the 2023 Oscars with a monologue that took pointed shots at no-show nominee Tom Cruise‘s infamous connections with Scientology and Will Smith‘s horrific slap. Kimmel mocked both Cruise (and Avatar: The Way of Water director James Cameron) for skipping the ceremony after insisting movie goers return to theaters, while he ended his monologue by revealing that the Academy had a crisis team in place to avoid another altercation on stage.

“We know this is a special night for you. We want you to have fun. We want you to feel safe. And most importantly, we want me to feel safe,” Kimmel said. “If anyone in this theatre commits an act of violence at any point during the show, you will be awarded the Oscar for Best Actor and permitted to give a nineteen-minute-long speech.”

Kimmel went on to warn that if anyone didn’t like his jokes — referring to how Smith slapped Chris Rock after the comedian mocked wife Jada Pinkett Smith’s bald head — they would have to fight through a long list of heroes, including “Adonis Creed,” aka Michael B. Jordan, Michelle Yeoh, a wary looking Andrew “Spider-Man” Garfield, and his sidekick Guillermo.

That wasn’t the only slap-related joke Kimmel made. After musing how five Irish actors were nominated, he joked, “the odds of a fight on stage just went way up.” He also teased that if anything akin to Smith’s slap happened again, the celebrity attendees should “just do what you did last year: nothing.”

But maybe the most pointed joke Kimmel made was at Top Gun: Maverick star and producer Tom Cruise’s expense. After mentioned that “everyone loved Top Gun,” he referenced Cruise’s shirtless scenes by saying, “L. Ron Hubba Hubba, you know what I’m saying.”

Other targets for Kimmel included box office bomb Babylon, Hollywood’s Ozempic craze, and Seth Rogen, whom he called the Hunter to director Steven Spielberg’s Joe Biden.

Tonight’s awards ceremony marked the third time that the ABC late night host has emceed the Academy Awards. Kimmel also hosted the Oscars in 2017 and 2018.