Hulu’s ‘Crush’ Is The Gen Z Queer Utopia I Never Got To Have

No one in Crush, a new queer teen romantic comedy that began streaming on Hulu on Friday, is in the closet. Why would they be? Homophobia is the last thing on anyone’s mind. In fact, there are so many queer teens at this fictional high school—Wiccan lesbians, horse gays, non-binary influencers, gateway gays, skater girl bisexuals, just to name a few—that the protagonist’s straight BFF (played by Tyler Alvarez) aggressively making out with his girlfriend feels out of place. Straight people? Kissing? At this school? Sure, Jan.

It means there are plenty of options for Rowan Blanchard’s character, a high school senior lesbian named Paige. Paige, an aspiring artist, only has eyes for her longtime crush, Gabriela (Isabella Ferreira). But, with a little bit of rom-com finagling, she’ll soon fall for Gabby’s reserved, aloof sister, AJ (Moana star Auli’i Cravalho). The lack of angst over anyone’s sexuality paves the way for the kind of straight-forward romance usually reserved for heterosexual rom-coms: Girl meets girl, girl initially dislikes girl, girl gets to know girl, girl falls in love. There are no coming-out scenes, because, as Paige’s character puts in the movie’s first 10 minutes, “I’ve been out for a really long time. I’m extremely gay.”

Had I watched Crush when I was a senior high school—11 years ago, in rural Michigan—it would have read as an utter and complete fantasy. There was one kid at school who was out, and everyone knew his name. He was the gay one, after all. I myself was aware of my feelings for girls—I’d been hopelessly in love with one since I was 13—but kept them tightly hidden away. It was my deepest, darkest secret, that I might be gay, kept at bay by my crushes on boys and Robert Pattinson. No one had said the word “bisexual” to me yet, so my thoughts were consumed by daily questions: “Am I gay? Could I be gay? Please, God, don’t let me be gay. OK, phew, I have a crush on a boy. I must not be gay.”

Being out in high school didn’t feel like an option. Teachers half-heartedly told kids off for using “gay” as an insult, but that hardly stopped them from saying it. One of my own friends deemed a book I checked out of the school library—The Bermudez Triangle by Maureen Johnson, an innocent YA novel about two girls falling in love—”gross.” (I stormed off with tears in my eyes. In retrospect, I was not subtle.) Watching Paige confidently consider her queer options in Crush, I was hit with a mix of joy, jealousy, and disbelief. Paige’s high school is a beautiful, uncomplicated queer utopia, unburdened by the weight of homophobia. Is it really so simple, just a decade later, for Gen Z to be gay?

According to Cravalho, the 21-year-old Hawaiian actor who, like her character in Crush, is openly bi, the answer is: yes. Though, she also caveats that she was fortunate to grow up in a progressive environment. “I had a lot of queer friends,” she told Decider in a previous interview. “I kissed a lot of my friends, I’ll be honest. I also went to school in Hawai’i, so yeah my school was very diverse, and pretty darn inclusive, which I’m really grateful for.” Cravalho added that she hopes Crush can help reach those who aren’t yet on board with the blasé attitude toward sexuality that Paige and her friends have. “Because suddenly you see someone who’s living this way, and you realize, ‘Oh people are gay. Okay!’ And again, it’s not a character trait. It’s just something that exists. Because that’s really how it is. Teens are gay!”

Would it have been a balm for me, a 17-year-old closeted bisexual, to see a high school where the no-nonsense track coach (a hilarious Aasif Mandvi) casually describes the student body as “60 percent queer,” as if it’s nothing? Maybe. Or maybe it would have cracked open my fissure of loneliness further, seeing teenagers on my TV who were free in a way that, at the time, felt impossible for me. I think, perhaps, I would have felt more seen by a show like Heartstopper, Netflix’s recent British coming-of-age series that features a character furiously Googling “am I gay,” crying while taking BuzzFeed sexuality spectrum quizzes, and watching YouTube videos about what it means to be bisexual.

But perhaps that’s the jealously speaking. I can’t deny there’s something beautiful and escapist about watching Crush now; disappearing into a world where prejudice doesn’t exist. It’s a tempting fantasy, and one I desperately want to believe. Maybe the next generation, surrounded by queer characters in their media, simply won’t have to agonize over their sexuality at all. Wouldn’t that be wonderful?

Real life is always more complex than Hollywood makes it seem, of course. Crush is no exception. Queer teens in Texas—where the governor recently attempted to outlaw gender-affirming medical care for transgender children—surely feel the threat of homophobia all too acutely. And I suspect my old high school in rural Michigan isn’t covered in rainbow flags just yet, either.  But who says movies always need to reflect reality? This is a fluffy romantic comedy, after all. The high school in Crush might not be real for teens across America just yet, but maybe it’s closer than we think. It never hurts to dream big.