‘Riverdale’: Did Gladys Give Jughead Trichinosis With Her Gross, Raw Bacon?

There’s a lot to unpack from last night’s return of Riverdale, “Chapter Forty-Eight: Requiem for a Welterweight.” There were huge revelations about the connection between cult The Farm and the monstrous Gargoyle King. Betty Cooper’s (Lili Reinhart) life may change forever, after her mother Alice (Mädchen Amick) decided to commit to The Farm. And Archie (KJ Apa) and Josie (Asheligh Murray) kicked things up a notch in their relationship.

But perhaps most important of all: did Gladys Jones (Gina Gershon) give her son Jughead (Cole Sprouse) trichinosis from the gross, raw bacon she clearly served him?

To set the scene, Gladys has moved back from Toledo with her daughter Jellybean (Trinity Likins) and is now living with Jughead and FP Jones (Skeet Ulrich). In the opening moments of this week’s episode, as Jughead lies conked out on the couch, Gladys preps an all-american breakfast of bacon, eggs and coffee for the family. Except, and here’s the thing, that bacon is raw. Like, completely, disgustingly raw.

Just in case you think I’m exaggerating, or maybe it’s hard to tell from that far away, here’s a close up of the limp, disease-ridden monstrosity as Gladys places it on the plate:

Now, I’ll grant you that maybe it’s cooked around the sides, though that could be the coloring from the curing process, it’s hard to tell. But inside? Raw, raw, raw. And it’s not Canadian bacon, either: those are strips of good ol’ American bacon, served cold and fatty.

For those of you wondering whether you can eat bacon raw? The answer is, it depends a lot on the process used to make it. Despite being cured and sometimes smoked, store-bought bacon (and let’s be honest, the Jones family isn’t buying prime cuts from a high-end butcher) usually isn’t heated to an internal temperature of 145 degrees, which would kill bacteria and parasites, making it safe to eat raw like deli meats. Can you risk it all and eat raw bacon? Sure. But also… Why? Why would you do that? You need at least a little give, a little crunch to get to prime bacon levels. What Gladys is serving up there is about two steps away from oinking.

And if Gladys did serve Jughead raw, parasite filled bacon in the morning, that may explain why he’s so testy with Toni Topaz (Vanessa Morgan) later in the episode at Pop’s Diner. Eating raw bacon could, potentially, infect you with the trichinella larvae, which causes an infection popularly known as trichinosis. It causes diarrhea, cramps, pains and fever. Here’s a shot of Jughead post-convo with Toni, wondering if he has time to make it to the bathroom:

So is that what happened? Is Jughead dealing with a serious infection all episode long? Is this Gladys’s diabolical plot, to feed everyone raw meats and get them so sick she can take over the town of Riverdale?

Well… No. Because if you examine the bacon she actually serves to Jughead, which is a thing I did because I clearly have a lot of time on my hands, sometime between when she pulls it off the griddle and plops it down on the table, the bacon becomes fully cooked:

So new theory time. Gladys isn’t trying to kill Jughead with trichinosis… She’s a witch, and uses her power to cook food off the stove. Boom. Nailed it.

Also please don’t ever eat raw bacon, it’s gross. Thanks.

Riverdale airs Wednesdays at 8/7c on The CW

Where to stream Riverdale