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Video may very well have killed the radio star, but streaming definitely killed the video store. There is a certain nostalgic sheen that those pre-Blockbuster days have taken on, those days when families migrated to the local mom and pop video store on a Friday night and wandered the aisles in search of something to watch, but the truth of the matter was that the process was very frustrating. The advantages that the streaming revolution has over those VHS days are myriad—no more waiting in line, no more frustration that the movie you wanted to watch wasn’t in stock, no more leaving the house, even!—but there is one thing that we find ourselves missing from time-to-time: the captivating VHS artwork that you’d see when browsing the aisles.
Now that we’re in the midst of Stream & Scream month, we’ve been experiencing some flashbacks of the VHS covers that haunted us in our youth. Specifically, the titles in the horror section that left psychic scars we can still feel to this day. Films like Faces Of Death, Hellraiser and I Spit On Your Grave had cover art so audacious that we would never even DREAM of asking our parents to rent them. Movies that spooked us so much that even when we came of age, we dared not watch them.
Here’s a smattering of retro box art for horror films on VHS that you are DEFINITELY going to want to flip through with the lights on.
I don’t have the numbers in front of me, but I’m pretty sure sales of wicker baskets fell 10 million percent thanks to this horrorshow of a VHS cover.
[Rent it on Amazon Video]
Photo Credit: VHS Collector
To this day, if you put a shish kebab in front of me, I will scream my lungs out in terror. This cover traumatized me! The lesson learned? DON’T EVER SKIP ANYONE’S BIRTHDAY PARTY EVER. (Thanks to Thighmaster for jogging my memory on this one!)
[Stream it on Amazon Video]
Speaking of birthday parties… I love parties. Parties are fun! But ever since I saw the VHS cover for this film, I have always gone to parties with a slight sense of mistrust about the host. Specifically, what they might be hiding behind their back. A sharp knife? A ponytail noose? This cover is pretty much why I stopped socializing. (Oh, and I never connected the dots until now, but doesn’t that booty look a LOT like Pippa Middleton’s? Watch out, Wills!)
[Stream it on Amazon Video]
Photo Credit: Serial Killer Calendar
Spitting is cool. Graves are cool. Spitting on graves, though? Not cool! As I recall, this movie was rated X. Not XXX, but just plain X. When you’re a pre-teen, that X rating scares the crap out of you.
[Rent it on Amazon Video]
Photo Credit: VHS Collector
At some point in the early ’90s, Pinhead was on the Mount Rushmore of horror film fiends (alongside Freddy, Jason, and Michael Myers). It was at this point that I finally got around to seeing Clive Barker’s twisted psychosexual tale. That was a mistake, because the film that I saw was a million times more disturbing than this already EXTREMELY disturbing cover.
[Stream it on Netflix]
Photo Credit: Clive Barker Cast
Two things I was scared of in my formative years were things that were evil and things that were dead. I finally worked up the courage to see this movie in the late ’90s and, you know what? It’s a masterpiece. (Still, that didn’t mean that the cover didn’t scare me shitless growing up.)
[Stream it on Amazon Video]
Photo Credit: EvilDeadNews.com
I can only imagine this film was conceived in the wake of the international success of Rosemary’s Baby, but all I knew when I was roaming the aisles in my local video store growing up was that I did NOT want to see the face of whatever was in that crib. And now, some 20+ years later, I still don’t. (h/t to Tom Hall, aka @BRM, for reminding me about this one!)
[Rent it on Amazon Video]
Photo Credit: Horrorpedia
Everybody loves monkeys, right? NOT AFTER YOU SEE THIS YOU WON’T. It’s not a movie about a clapping monkey toy come to life (a la Chucky), but instead it’s the psycho cousin of Project X.
[Stream it on Prime Video]
Photo Credit: VHS Collector
You know a good way to prevent kids from sneaking downstairs in the middle of the night on Christmas Eve? Show them this video cover. They might even convert to atheism.
[Rent it on Amazon Video]
Photo Credit: Neon-Maniacs.com
I don’t know what was in the water in 1984, but a hell of a lot of these crazy covered movies came out that year. Do you know what C.H.U.D. stands for? Cannibalistic Humanoid Underground Dwellers. As soon as I saw this craziness, that pretty much cured me of my desire to explore the sewer system.
[Rent it on Amazon Video]
Did you know that there is a Halloween film that DOESN’T star Michael Myers? That’s this one. Of course, I never saw it because that face in the sky freaked me out.
[Rent it on Amazon Video]
Photo Credit: Serial Killer Calendar
I hate bugs. I’m pretty sure everyone else does, too. You know who else hates bugs? Jennifer Connolly! I hear she bathes in Raid everyday after working on this movie when she was only 15.
[Stream it on Indieflix]
You know all those times you sprinkled salt on the slugs that showed up in your garden or backyard? That was a bad idea. A VERY BAD IDEA!
[Rent it on Amazon Video]
Photo Credit: io9
This movie was the directorial debut of monster movie visual effects artist Stan Winston. Unfortunately, not a single person ever watched it because THAT COVER WAS JUST TOO DAMN SCARY.
[Rent it on Amazon Video]
Photo Credit: Horrorpedia
I ended up watching this movie approximately 500 times on HBO during the ’80s, but the animated intros to these films still give me the willies to this very day.
[Rent it on Amazon Video]
Photo Credit: GhoulBasement.com
Ask D.J. Cotrona what I’m talkin’ about. He knows.
[Buy it on Apple]
Photo Credit: RareCultCinema.com
The lady demon on the cover of this classic makes Regan from The Exorcist look like Little Orphan Annie.
[Rent it on Amazon Video]
Photo Credit: The Horrors Of Halloween
Remember that scene in The Wrath Of Khan where those leeches crawled into people’s ears? This movie takes that to the next level, except the leeches have a face and they devour people’s brains. Not for the faint of heart!
[Stream it on Fandor]
Photo Credit: Monster Brains
Decider’s own Meghan O’Keefe just described this film as “the problematic slasher movie that gets scarier with time.” All I know is that this VHS cover belongs in the Smithsonian.
[Watch Sleepaway Camp on ShoutFactoryTV]
Photo Credit: VHS Collector
Cults are creepy. Sex cults are creepier. Sex cults populated by werewolves are the creepiest.
[Buy it on iTunes]
Photo Credit: Serial Killer Calendar
This was, by far, the goriest cover in my local video store. I lost many nights of sleep due to this insanity.
[This movie is, thankfully, not available to stream]
Photo Credit: ShockTillYouDrop.com
I vividly remember watching this movie during an afternoon creature feature, hosted by Sir Graves Ghastly, on Detroit TV (Channel 20, if memory serves). The plot involves an astronaut who goes into space and, well, melts when he returns to Earth! Pretty sure this movie had a lot to do with the eventual defunding of NASA.
[This movie is not available to stream]
Photo Credit: Horror.mdv.se
Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Xtro was the reaction to E.T.. Phone home to tell your parents that you’re DEAD!
[This movie is not available to stream]
Photo Credit: VHS Collector
The cover of this VHS cassette tape isn’t particularly scary in and of itself, but the legend of this film was — ESPECIALLY in the pre-Internet era. The rumors of the horrors that were contained within were enough to scare me forever.
[This movie is not available to stream]
If I were to choose a favorite VHS cover of all-time, it would be this one. Equal parts titillating and terrifying. A bravura display of art direction. I’m sure the film itself was garbage, but there’s probably never been a better piece of cover art.
[This movie is not available to stream]
Photo Credit: LunchMeatVHS.com
100% nightmare fuel.
[Rent it on Amazon Video]
Photo Credit: VHS Collector
What did we miss? Let us know in the comments!
