When your first baby is born, you are either completely underprepared, and believe the baby will come out after five minutes of heavy breathing and a little gasp, or completely overprepared and have written a nine-page birth plan and packed everything from a yoga ball to a Celine Dion ‘best of’ CD. Either way, you are terrified about the state of your lady parts. Your husband would never admit it, but so is he. You have attended every prenatal class, read every book and high-lighted all the…