‘She’s Gotta Have It’ Episode 7 Recap

I’m not making love to either Greer or Jamie, and I’m tired. Episode 7 of Netflix’s She’s Gotta Have It, titled “#HowToMakeLoveToANegroWithoutGettingTired,” follows Nola Darling on an out of the ordinary date with Greer and gives us another look inside Jamie’s household. This episode attempts to flesh out Greer in a similar manner to the way Jamie and Mars have been in the two previous episodes, and while I remain largely unimpressed with Greer as a person, I am glad to have some sort of explanation as to how a woman like Nola would come to be with a man like Greer. Though we only saw him for a split second at Nola’s art show, Greer is now more drawn to Nola than ever because of how impressive her work is. But his opening monologue reveals him to be as basic as we’ve known him to be—he’s a man who wants what he can’t have. Greer knows he’s a good catch, and can’t understand why Nola isn’t as interested in him as she is in, say, Opal. But Greer is going to possess Nola, even if that means breaking the ground rules she set when they began their sexual relationship.

It’s the day after the art show, and Nola is depressed. Against her better judgment, Nola keeps rewatching Julius Kemper, the pushy art critic who attended the show, vlog a review of the event and it is harsh. He decides that Nola is the weakest link of the four artists because it is “pedestrian” and less “political” than that of the others. Kemper feels that Nola’s portraits lack intensity and the collection of pieces lack a unifying principal (this is despite Nola having told him that the “free female black form” was the unifying principal the night before). Kemper decides that her answer is not good enough, using his authority as a white man to decide for a black woman whether or not her presentation of black female freedom is valid or sufficiently political. So hides out alone in her apartment, avoiding all communication. But Greer, determined to get to know Nola outside her Loving Bed, shows up to Nola’s apartment unannounced and after some pushback, convinces Nola to go on an actual date with him.

Greer and Nola’s date goes a lot better than I would have imagined. Greer takes Nola to see a classic black and white film, and then to a vegan French restaurant. The place is teeming with adoring women that Greer has had sex with in the past, but Nola is unphased by their presence, which intrigues him more. Greer sets down his arrogance just enough to have discuss the binary nature of Blackness as it is perceived in America versus his native France, and his rejection of limited notions of Blackness on the part of white gatekeepers assuages some of Nola’s frustrations with Julius Kemper’s critique of her work. They continue to share with one another, with Greer revealing that he’s too scared to leave commercial photography work for his more artistic pursuits. They discuss more art, and literature, and Greer gifts Nola the book How To Make Love To A Negro Without Getting Tired. Greer makes the mistake of thinking he has won Nola over, and asks her to go on dates out in the real world more often. Nola, commitmentphobe that she is, is overwhelmed by Greer’s request and takes off.

And, only two episodes after the first visit with Jamie and his family made me empathize deeply with him, the second visit with his made me despise him. Jamie is still living in the separate bedroom downstairs, and even after that emotional father son conversation he and Virgil had, Jamie doesn’t seem any more connected with Virgil than he had before. Why would he have to ask Cheryl “How is our son doing?” if there had been any actual progress made in the relationship. The lessons of their conversation seem to have stuck with the boy, at least. Virgil performs Jimi Hendrix’s protest version of “The Star Spangled Banner” on his guitar. He tells his parents he practiced that version of the anthem after thinking about who he is, the history of the country, and learning that the anthem is a racist pro-slavery song. No doubt this episode was written at the height of the hubbub surrounding NFL player Colin Kaepernick’s anti-police brutality protests of the National Anthem, with writer Joie Lee opting for an “out of the mouths of babes” approach to the social justice message this time around.

But Jamie feels stuck. He monologues to the audience about the pain of being deeply in love with Nola, but holding fast to a promise to never leave his family the way his father had left his. He’s constantly contemplating Love vs. Duty, wondering if he’s brave enough to leave everything for Nola; he needs Nola, but he knows his family needs him more. He has purchased the self portrait Nola presented at her art show, but possessing a cold 2D version of her whilst living in a cold bedroom in the home that houses his cold, loveless marriage is not enough.

This is the worst of Jamie we’ve seen thus far. Jamie thinks this sort of selfishness and greed is a beautiful poetry. How?! Jamie’s proximity to his son doesn’t seem to be of any major consequence. Jamie still lives in their home and is pretty checked out of his relationship with his son. Is there any benefit to living in a tense space to barely be more emotionally available to Virgil? Even deciding which parent will attend Virgil’s student teacher night is a fight. And what good does it do for Cheryl to be stuck in a marriage with a man in love with another woman just because he has hang ups from his childhood? Doesn’t she deserve love, too?

Also? Jamie even thinking about leaving his family to be with Nola Darling is insane. Even with the flashback to his and Nola’s meet cute, nothing about their relationship, even at its best suggest that a healthy, monogamous, out in the open marriage would be in their future. Jamie is the older sugar daddy of young artist too scared of commitment to let Greer finish asking her on a second date! She didn’t even invite Jamie to her art show! He’s been calling her and getting no answer. What can he possibly be thinking?! He’s not thinking. He can’t be. Because a thinking man’s response to Nola’s non-response would not be to go upstairs to his wife’s bathroom to shower and presumably have sex with her. It’s a bizarre thing to discourage a man from sleeping with his wife, but, attempting reconciliation after being rejected by your mistress is not a good faith or healthy attempt at working things out.

The genuine makeup session of this episode is Nola and Shemeka’s. Nola runs away from her date with Greer and visits Shemeka at the hospital. Shemeka is responsive now, and each tells the other about her bad night the night before. Nola apologizes through drunk tears for not being a good enough friend, and Shemeka apologizes, I think, for almost dying. I hope this make up sticks better than any of Jamie’s do. Shemeka deserves a break.

Rae Sanni is a comedian and writer from Brooklyn, NY who has been bringing her unique perspective on everything from pop culture to race and gender relations to audiences all over. Rae is a staff writer on Comedy Central’s The President Show and cohosts the podcast Misandry with Marcia and Rae. You can find Rae on Twitter @Raesanni.

Watch She's Gotta Have It Episode 7 ("#HowToMakeLoveToANegroWithoutGettingTired") on Netflix